Runaway
by ffffuturelove
Summary: The third and final installment to the Rebel Girl series. Leia is running from Draco and herself, but all she finds is a war.
1. Chapter 1

Hey, this is the final multi chapter part to the Rebel Girl series. I've been working on it for a while, and then I put it down, but now it's here. It's quite a ride. Strap in.

I love each and everyone of you.

Rated M for language, themes, and sexual situations.

I do not own any bit of the Harry Potter franchise.

1997

Runaway by Kanye West ft. Pusha T

While shoving clothing into a box, Leia was interrupted by someone clearing their throat. She turned with her hand on her wand on instinctive.

"Honey, you have some visitors." Her mother said. Leia walked with her mother, down the stairs with her hand on her wand even after she saw Hermione Granger standing in her alcove with another man. Hermione looked nervous, but somewhat unchanged from when Leia had last seen her. The man next to her was mid-forties, tall, and a few scars on his face. He wore a dark brown, pinstriped suit that Leia admired. Something made her wonder if these were Death Eaters with polyjuice potion.

"Uh, hi, how do you know where I live?" Leia asked. She was scared, just like she had been for the past few weeks.

"McGonagall, of course." Hermione answered with nerves showing in her voice. She must have noticed how Leia's hand was in her pocket.

"And who are you?" Leia asked to the man.

"My name is Remus Lupin, I am here today representing the Order, and I thought it might be appropriate to bring along a familiar face." He said gesturing to Hermione.

"Um, do come in and sit down." Leia said trying to keep calm as she walked them into their living room. "I guess I'm supposed to offer tea, but I'm pretty sure we only have coffee."

"Coffee sounds great." Remus said before sitting down on an antique velvet chair.

"I'm fine." Hermione said, attempting to be causal.

"Do you want cream or sugar?" She asked, pretending she was a good host.

"I'll take it black, thanks."

"A man after my own heart." She said while walking into the kitchen. Her hands were shaking. These people could be death eaters. They could have terrible news. People she cared about could be dead. They had been so out of the news for the past few weeks that the war could have ended and she'd have no idea.

Luckily they always had coffee brewing in the Allen household, so it didn't take her long to fill a mug for her guest. She thought of making one for herself, but then she would have a mug in each hand and not a free hand to keep on her wand. Hopefully everything was okay. Maybe the war was over and everything was normal again.

She came back a moment later with coffee for Remus, and sat down in the chair that faced both of them. There was a silence for a moment as Remus took a drink that was interrupted by Luke walking through the room.

"Guests?" He asked as he walked with a medium sized box in his hands.

"Yup. Hermione Granger and Remus Lupin." Leia said, still trying to be calm.

"You look familiar…" Remus asked Luke, to Leia's surprise.

"I feel like I've met you before." Luke said putting down a box to look at the man better.

"Oh, I remember now, you were in the train station and you didn't have any wizard money and I paid for your ticket."

"Yes, I remember now, when I introduced myself you had already heard of Leia. And thank you again for the train ride."

"You're welcome."

Luke nodded, picked up his box, and left saying, "I'd love to stay and chat but I've got packing to do!"

This must be Remus Lupin if he knew about this random event. A Death Eater wouldn't have known that. And that must be real Hermione, because with Lupin wouldn't go places with impostors. Leia sighed in relief and took her hand out of her pocket.

When Luke was gone, Leia turned to her guests.

"So why did the two of you come to find me?" Leia asked.

"Well, as I said, I am here representing the Order. You've actually been a somewhat frequent topic of debate. We have been long aware of your talents in wizardry, teaching, and more recently healing. From what I understand you were a critical part in Dumbledore's Army. We are all very impressed with you." Lupin paused to find the right words. "To be honest, half of us want to offer you protection within our ranks and the other half don't trust you. However, after several debates, we have decided that you are too important to be left unprotected. There are a few safe houses left that we can offer a room for you."

Leia sighed and let the words sink in. She felt like she was a somewhat trustworthy person, minus the whole murderer ex-boyfriend.

"What about my family?" She said in almost a whisper.

"Well, unfortunately, of the three safe houses that we do have, there would not be enough room for four people and two animals. However, as I can see, your family is moving. If they are moving out of England, they should be safe. We have no reason to believe that You-Know-Who's side has any interest in going after your family."

Leia looked at Lupin seriously.

"Why, is there a Death Eater mailer that states their intentions for the next quarter?" she said.

Lupin laughed, but mostly sighed.

"Snape has been our spy into You-Know-Who's agenda since before you were born, so that's probably better than a mailer."

Leia had a hard time trusting Snape after he ratted out her Draco phase to Lord-Fucking-Voldemort. The embarrassment of last Valentine's Day had not been forgotten.

"So you have reason to believe they have plans to capture me?" She said trying to stay calm.

"Kidnapping you has been used as a threat to Draco Malfoy. Apparently he wasn't following instructions as well as You-Know-Who wanted, but now he is."

Leia swallowed in slight horror. Bellatrix's words from last year echoed in her head.

"Where would I be living?"

"Probably with Ron's brother and his wife. It's by the sea."

"I wouldn't be able to go outside, would I?"

"Outside yes, traveling around would be tricky."

"Are there any other options?" Leia asked sadly.

"Well, you could tell us where you were going to live and Snape could lead them off your trail."

Leia really didn't want to live as a captive. She didn't want to be a captive in the infamous Malfoy Mannor as much as she didn't want to be captive in Ron's brother's seaside house. But she really didn't want Snape knowing where she lived.

"I really don't want Snape knowing where my family and I are."

Lupin looked at her curiously.

"Snape has been a very trusted member-"

"Oh, I know Snape's reputation. However, I do know for a fact that it was Snape who told You-Know-Who about me in the first place. So there are some trust issues."

Leia had wondered if Snape had a personal issue with her, or if she was purely meant for blackmailing Draco. Either way, she wasn't fond of her former professor.

"Well, you can deny our protection, and the Death Eaters might find you or you could take our offer and Snape might tell the Death Eaters where to find you."

"So I'm possibly fucked either way."

"I trust Snape. It's not my problem if you don't trust him, but your whereabouts will be on a need-to-know basis."

Leia sighed. She hated that she had to make this decision. She was only 17. She went with her gut.

"My family has some friends in a commune called Saint-Glen in North Western France. We'll be hiding there."

"Is there an address?"

"We're living in a house, on a farm that is on La Roch, I believe, and I'm not sure they have house numbers. I think it's like a P.O. box kinda place."

"How is your French?" Hermione asked, speaking for the first time.

"Terrible."

"What will you be doing there?" Hermione asked.

"No idea, but, um, we are going under the name Stuart. I am Ashley Stuart, my brother Evan Stuart, my mother Olivia will be Alison Stuart, and my father Victor will be Robert Stuart. We are from Wichita, Kansas and are staying with our distant relatives, the Belaires, because we are running from the law. This is the plan Hugo Belaire came up with, and apparently this isn't the first time a family running from the law has come to Saint-Glen."

Hermione nodded.

"I wish you luck." Lupin said standing up. "We really do need to get going."

Leia nodded and led them out the door. Hermione waved a sad goodbye before they walked out. Leia whispered goodbye as tried to breathe.

xoxo

First chapter dedicated to readingfairy


	2. Chapter 2

Sorry if the names get confusing, that's kind of the point. Just a reminder, Leia is now Ashley, Luke is now Evan, and the rest don't really matter. Enjoy and review.

* * *

Furthest Thing by Drake

Everything was a bright green in Saint-Glen. Leia didn't expect it to be so beautiful, but it was like being surrounded by postcards of green pastures. All of the buildings were old and made of stone. The roads twisted and turned in the most beautiful ways. This was so different than St Louis, New York, or London. She was comfortable in cities, but maybe this change of scenery would be good for her.

The house, the Belaire's house, was the largest in the city and they were obviously the wealthiest. Well off dairy farmers with 25 employees, lived comfortably in a house with three more bedrooms then they needed. It was luck that Hugo knew of the Allens. Hugo's brother worked with Leia's father Victor closely in London, and he met Hugo at a dinner party. Victor called Hugo up when he remembered they lived in an obscure village in France. Things looked like they would work out just fine here. Hopefully it would be like a long vacation.

Unfortunately, first dinner at the Belaire's house was most awkward meal Leia had ever had. It was just like the first meal with new roommates the first night freshman year of college, only if one roommate was actually a family of four and 'running from the law.'

"Ashley, Evan and I are the same age. We will be in the same level in school.*" Jerome, the son, said to make some noise other than the clicking of knives on glass plates. He spoke the best English.

"When does school start?" Leia, or rather Ashley's, mother asked.

"September." He said before pausing to take a bite of chicken. "We're in _Premi__è__re_, the level for 16, 17 years old. You choose which _sé__ries _you want to study in. There is _Sé__ries S_, science and math, _Sé__ries ES_, economics and social sciences, and _Sé__ries L_, literature. I am in _Sé__ries S_, the most common."

"What do you think you'll do?" Leia, Ashely, asked her brother. She would have normally chosen the literature option, but her French was slightly worse than an 8 year old. Her brother was slightly better than her, but was never a reader. He was never really a 'school' person in the first place. He tended to charm the teachers, but then blow off most classes and spend every lunch period playing guitar with gang, but that was years ago back in Saint Louis. She didn't even know what his British grades were.

"Probably the science and math one." He said causally.

"Are you good at either of those?" Ashley said surprised.

"I took calculus and physics last year, so yeah…"

She had done rather well in Arithmancy, but that was numerology, not calculus. Ashley, when she was Leia, also did well in Potions, but there was no periodic table like chemistry. There was of course Healing, which she was very good at, but it was mostly about potions and spells along with some anatomical knowledge. It was in that moment when she realized that her Hogwarts education had kind of been useless.

"So…" Leia said out loud while reeling over her education.

"Well, you _did_ go to a fine arts based private school for the last two years." Her mother said, weaving more lies to keep track of.

"There are some art electives you could take." Jerome said, feeling pity on Ashley.

"I mean, I did very well in biology, so I guess I'll take the sciences one…"

Her father nodded, pleased. He was never a fan of Leia going into fashion like his wife had.

"Do you play football, Evan?" Hugo Belaire asked in a deep voice. When they first entered the house Hugo was watching a game. Ashely, Leia, had to stifle a chuckle knowing that her brother was even more unathletic than she was.

"I've played with my friends occasionally. Nothing too serious." He answered, probably lying.

"I play forward." Jerome said, in an excited tone.

"I've usually been a midfielder."

_Wait. Did Luke, my Luke, just use a soccer term?_

"My team needs a midfielder."

"I'd join."

_What? HE__'__LL JOIN? Doesn__'__t he know if he joins he__'__ll have to play?_

"I'll talk to my coach about it." Jerome said nodding enthusiastically.

"Cool." Evan said with the same enthusiasm.

Leia, Ashley, tried to hide the shock from her face. She felt like she didn't know her brother at all.

"Does your family go to church on Sundays?" Alison Stewart asked, changing the subject.

"Yes. The Catholic church is close." Hugo responded, smiling.

"We will have to join your congregation." Alison said, with a similar smile.

_Wait. We'__re Catholics now?_

Leia Allen wasn't even baptized. She had never been to church in her life. Luke didn't seem fazed by the comment, so maybe he had started going to church? Apparently the Stewarts were Catholic, but why hadn't any of the Allens mentioned a practicing religion around Leia?

Leia/Ashley incredibly felt light headed all of the sudden.

"I'm sorry, I'm not feeling very well. If you'll let me be excused, where should I clean my plate?" She said standing up.

"I clean food." Emmeline, the mother, said loudly, the first time she had spoken at dinner. She knew very little English, and must have felt embarrassed about it. She only spoke to the Stewarts when necessary.

"Leave it there." Hugo said after Ashley looked confused for a moment.

"_Merci_." She said as she left the table. Margo, the youngest, waved as Ashley left.

She walked up the stairs to her room, between the one of the bathrooms and Margo's room. It was across from Jerome's and Luke/Evan's various rooms and washroom. The master bedroom, where Emmeline and Hugo slept was upstairs next to another guest room where Robert and Alison slept.

Uhura was hiding in Ashley's room. The Belaires had a dog, a Yorkshire terrier that was smaller than both Uhura and Spock. Uhura didn't really know what to do with it so she avoided their dog, Garcon, at all costs. Spock got along with it better. The Allen's pets were the only ones who got to keep their identities.

Leia laid down on the bed and Uhura curled up to her. She felt like she didn't know her own family, the Allens or the Stewarts. Her mother had told Leia that she needed to keep her wand hidden so as not to raise suspicion. Luke and their mother hardly ever used magic in the first place. She hated feeling unprotected. She knew she had the power to make certain spells without her wand, but she didn't feel comfortable without it anymore.

Luke knocked on the door.

"Hey, can I come in?" He asked behind the door.

"Of course you can." Leia said feeling confused again. They almost never _asked_ to go into each other's rooms, instead they just walked in. It felt like they weren't twins anymore.

When Luke shut the door, Leia grabbed her wand from her pillow case and casted a silencing spell.

"Are we Catholics?" Leia asked, moving to the floor to sit with her brother.

"We started going last November. I think Mom felt like she wanted to start going after she started reading the Daily Prophet. She was worried about you and me. She felt like she needed a higher power do deal with the stress. Dad went with her, and I went out of obligation."

"Are you baptized?"

"Yeah, we all got baptized last spring."

"You know, you could have mentioned this in all of those letters you wrote me, instead of writing about what happened on the last episode of Seinfeld."

"Seinfeld is funnier, and I didn't think you'd ever have to care about it."

"Do I have to go to church now?"

"It might look funny if only Mom, Dad, and I show up."

"It might look funnier when the bread thing happens and I can't go up because I'm not baptized."

Luke made a face.

"Maybe we can lie and pretend you were baptized. I mean we've lied about everything else, so what's one more to add to the list?"

"Do, like, you believe in all of it? God, Jesus, the pope?"

"No, not at all. We're wizards and pagans by species. But this wasn't about me, it was about Mom. And I'm sure we'll become more and more involved, because Mom has been freaking out."

"She has?" Leia said feel guiltier than she had before that sentence.

"Yeah, I mean, when your daughter's ex-boyfriend's cult threatens your family, you'll freak out too. She's going to put all of her time into doing church functions."

Leia hated this. She sighed.

"Since when do you play soccer?"

"It's football, get that straight first. People can get pretty nasty about it. And yeah, back in London I played after school a lot with some friends. I'm not terrible at it."

"And math?"

"I actually started applying myself in London. I got good grades, 3.7 GPA."**

"I'm bummed… I thought you would be as fucked educationally as I am."

"Well, you did really well at Hogwarts, didn't you?"

"I did, but like, potions is chemistry without the theory, arithmacy is calculus without the formulas, and healing is biology without the actual medicine. Really, the only thing that is helping me now is muggle studies, and that was learning about things I already knew."

"You're a good student though, and that's what matters."

"I have the French of a 6 year-old. How am I going to learn anything if I only understand every third word they say?"

"It'll be rough. I mean, over time you'll improve, but it'll suck at first. It will be hard to make new friends, and even harder to talk to your teachers. You're a hard worker though and that's what counts.

"You'll sit with me at lunch, right?" Leia asked, feeling vulnerable.

"Only to keep the guys off of you."

"Luke! I mean, Evan!" She said correcting herself.

"Seriously, did you even notice how Jerome was looking at you?"

"No…" Leia said embarrassed.

"I bet these country boys won't know what hit them. And the girls will be all over you too. Europeans love American students, just as much as we love people with accents."

"Whatever." Leia said rolling her eyes. "So, have you noticed no one smokes here? I thought these people were French for God's sake."

"I have noticed that… I don't know why that is either."

"I feel like I can't smoke here… It's too signature _me_ and it'll make me more noticeable."

"You? Quitting smoking?"

"Ugh, I hate the thought of it. It makes me want a cigarette."

"Did you bring a pack?"

"I brought like five."

"Throw them out. Quit cold turkey. You've only been doing this for a few years, it'll be easier that way. Especially now that you're in a smoke free community."

"Doubt it." Leia said, frowning.

At that moment there was a knock on the door. Leia used her wand to cancel the silencing charm, and then stuffed her wand under the mattress.

"_Entrez_." Leia said smoothly. The door opened to find Jerome looking at them sitting on the floor.

"Hey, I wanted to see if you feeling okay, and to where your brother had gone."

"I'm feeling better, and here he is. Want to join us?" Ashley replied, smiling.

"Sure." Jerome said, sitting down next to Evan.

"So what do you do for fun around here?" Evan asked curiously.

"Eh, we go to the cinema, ocean is not too far, play football, eh, go to Paris on the weekends…"

"Do you party?" Ashley asked, feeling adventurous.

Jerome raised his eyebrows a little.

"Oh, yes, we party."

"When's the next party?" Evan asked, looking at the Frenchmen incredulously.

"Tonight. I was planning on going. We can escape if you guys are quiet."

"Oh, we can be very quiet." Ashley said eyeing Jerome. She was willing to unleash some pent up energy.

"Meet in the kitchen at one tonight, my parents will be well asleep by then." He said with a smirk.

"What kind of party is it?" Even asked, while hiding his excitement.

"Dancing, drinking, music, that kind of party. It is at my friend's house."

"Will your friends know English?" She asked hoping she wouldn't have to use too much of her awful French.

"Yes, some."

"Great."

"Oh, football is about to start. France versus Bosnia."

Evan, not Luke anymore, stood up with Jerome.

"Are you guys still bitter about losing to the Czechs last year?" Evan said as they walked towards the door.

"I will always be bitter about that match-" Jerome said closing the door.

Neither of them said goodbye. Of course not.

*All of the schooling information is from Wikipedia and I'm not French, so I don't know how correct it is.

**I couldn't find information of the British GPA equivalent, but I'd take suggestions.


	3. Chapter 3

More reviews would be cool, but here's the next chapter anyway. Just let it happen. Btw, there is some French in here that makes sense in context, so you don't really have to translate it. However, if you want to use google translate. Thanks.

Song: Bjork, "The Hunter"

Biochemistry homework turned out to be relatively challenging, but nothing she couldn't figure out. It was the fourth week of her new school, and she was doing objectively alright. Ashley's French had improved greatly thanks to partying every night during the summer, and meeting gobs of new people in the surrounding communes. At school she was relatively popular, she had already met most of the other students during break, and everyone seemed very interested in the Stewart twins.

Evan was on the football team, and apparently doing very well. Leia didn't really pay attention. She would go to his matches, but she would also bring a book. Sports without flying brooms were even more uninteresting than sports with flying brooms. Ashley had become her art teacher's favorite in the drawing class she was taking. She was fairly good at it, and the teacher believed the lie that she had been at a fine arts school for the last two years. All of their lies were working out.

"What homework are you doing?" Jerome said, opening the door to her bedroom. He had gotten to the point where he would just walk into her room. Jerome was the closest thing she had to a real friend here.

"Biochemistry." Leia as Ashley said, sitting at her desk, the only furniture other than the bed. Her room was painfully dull. It felt like a dorm room without anyone livening there.

Jerome had also taken a focus on biology, so they had all of the same classes.

"How is it?" He asked, looking at her work.

"Not as bad as I expected."

Jerome shrugged.

"Want to go out?"

"Where?"

"Erquy will only be nice for a few more days."

Ashley had begun noticed how restless Jerome is. He couldn't sit still for very long. He probably started his homework and got bored and wanted to get out of the house. Erquy was the town where the beach was that they always went to. It was only a thirty minute drive from the Belaire's house.

"Sure. Want to leave now?"

"Yeah, yeah, I want to get out of the house. Is Evan still on his walk?"

Evan had gotten in the habit of taking long walks for hours. At least that's what he said, the family really had no idea. Ashley assumed he was meeting some girl, but who knew?

"Yeah, he's gone."

Ashley nodded and reached down to put her shoes back on. She was grabbing a light jacket off the floor when she heard the patter of Margo's feet.

"_Où vas-tu_?" The eight year-old asked quietly, translating in English to 'Where are you going?'

"Erquy. _Venir avec nous?" _Her brother responded, asking her if she wanted to come along. Everyone was quite fond of the youngest Belaire.

"_Oui, s'il vous plaît_. _Permettez-moi de ma veste_." She nodded while smiling as she walked back to her room to get her jacket.

"You don't mind?" Jerome said looking to Ashley as she stood up and walked towards the door and into the hallway.

"Of course not. I love Margo."

Within five minutes they were in Jerome's car and on their way to one of the last good days of beach.

"_J'aime la plage_." Margo said, saying 'I love the beach,' when they were in the car, and Leia was shifting through Jerome's pile of CDs.

"_Moi aussi_." Ashley agreed, looking to the back seat of Jerome's Volvo. Margo had long blonde hair, and an honest face. She looked more like her father whereas Jerome took after his mother. She held the features well, but she would probably have an awkward phase in adolescence.

For his part, Jerome had a really good taste in music. Littered on floor of his passenger seat was Bjork's _Homogenic_, Morrissey's _Maladjusted_, _OK Computer_, Marcy Playground's album, Dinosaur Jr.'s _Hand It Over_, a bunch of Sonic Youth albums, but also Sleater-Kinney's _Dig Me Out._ The hardest part was finding a record that was appropriate for an 8 year old. While they were all in English, Leia put in Bjork just to be safe.

"_Cette musique est bizarre._" Margo said after a moment of Bjork singing, noting that music was strange, while looking dreamily out the window.

"_Ça vous plaît?_" Jerome asked, taking a quick look back at her. He would change it if she didn't like it. Margo didn't reply for a minute.

"_Oui_." She finally said.

Bjork's voice echoed through the car as they passed by rolling green pastures. The beauty of her surroundings wasn't worth the fear that Leia constantly felt. Even now, at this peaceful moment, she feared that she was endangering herself, Jerome, and Margot. She tried to shake the thought away, but it stayed.

"What you thinking?" Jerome asked, glancing over at her.

"About my secrets." Ashley replied, letting Leia show through a little.

"Can't you tell me? I won't tell anyone and Margot doesn't know English."

She smiled a little.

"I wish I could tell you everything, but I can't."

"How about I tell you one of my secrets?"

"Only if it's a good one."

Jerome had this goofy grin on his face, and Ashley felt like this was going to be good.

"I had a sexy dream about you last night."

She laughed.

"I thought you were going to tell me about something from your childhood or something."

"Children couldn't come up with this."

"I want to know details."

"Maybe later…" He said gesturing back to his sister. Ashley nodded and smirked.

"Tell me one of your secrets." Jerome continued after a beat.

"Mine are no fun."

"I think that's not true. It could be a silly secret."

She looked out the window and thought for a moment.

"I don't _get_ David Bowie."

"Eh?" Jerome said as he had to swerve the car in surprise a little. "Joke, right?"

"I know, I'm sorry. I respect him as an artist, and I like his fashion sense, but I don't _get_ him."

"What is there to get?" Jerome seemed rightfully offended.

"That's just it, I DON'T KNOW!" Leia said, hiding her face in her hands. "I'm so ashamed! I've never admitted it to anyone else!"

"That's good. No one else should know about that." Jerome laughed.

"I'm so sorry."

"_Y at-il un problème_?" Margo asked, confused.

"_Oui, tout va bien._" Jerome responded, reassuring her everything was fine.

Soon they arrived in Erquy, a fishing port that was a favorite of the Belaires. It was a charming town, with nice people and few tourists. The beach wasn't popular at this time of year, mid-September, and it was probably a bit too breezy to go there anyway, but it was too peaceful to miss. After parking the car, Jerome got the blanket that he kept in the back seat. They all laid down on the blanket, just far enough away from the shore not to get wet.

"_Puis-je obtenir de la glace_?" Margot asked after a while of sitting, basking in the sun. Not too far away was an ice cream trunk that she wanted to go to. Jerome nodded and started pulling out some coins out of his pocket.

"_Crème glacée_?" Jerome asked, looking to Ashley.

"_Non, merci_." She said, declining his offer.

"_Deux chocolat." _He told his sister, showing two fingers and adding coins into her hand. Margot nodded and skipped away.

"You're going to eat two ice cream cones?" Ashley asked, as Jerome watched her sister run up to the truck.

"No, I want to watch you eat one of them." She rolled her eyes at his comment.

"Well, Margot might have trouble holding three ice cream cones with only two hands."

"It will be fun to watch her try." He said laughing.

"Oh, I just remembered, I want to know the sex dream details."

"I tied you up and you called me _capitaine_."

"Is that it? Nautical BDSM?"

"I got to taste you."

Ashley arched an eyebrow.

"Then I took you from behind." He continued. "You enjoyed it a lot."

Leia snorted.

"And that's really what matters." She replied. As Margot walked carefully up to them, juggling three ice cream cones, a black butterfly flew onto Ashley's leg. The creature rested there for a moment, and instinct told Ashley to reach out and touch it. The butterfly immediately flew away as she got near it. Jerome noticed this altercation.

"Sometimes when you get so close to touching someone, they fly away and you never see them again."

The two looked at each other silently and let his comment sink in.

Margot finally made it with her strawberry ice cream, and the other two chocolates. Jerome took the two from her hands and gave one to Leia. She gave it a decisive lick as he stared at her.

"_Pensez-vous que Ashley est belle_?" Jerome asked Margo if she thought Ashley was beautiful. Ashley rolled her eyes.

"_Oui. Est-elle votre petite amie_?" Margot agreed and asking a cute question.

"What does _petite amie_ mean? Small friend?" Ashley asked.

"It means sweetheart. Are you my _petite amie_?" He asked looking at Ashley so sincerely.

"Maybe." She tried not to smile.

"_Peut-être_." He translated for Margot.

"_Je l'aime_." Margot answered, eating her ice cream absentmindedly.

"I like her too." Jerome said, looking at Ashley.

Leia tried not to roll her eyes at this romantic moment. Love had only made her cynical.


	4. Chapter 4

Song: #GETITRIGHT by Miley Cyrus

* * *

Leia sat on the floor of Jerome's room, drawing him, as he tried to stay still lying on his bed. He was terrible at modeling.

"Stop itching your leg." Leia said annoyed.

"Etching?" Jerome asked turning his head to her, only moving more. His English was great, but he forgot words a lot.

"This thing." Leia said as she scratched her leg dramatically.

"Ah, _démangeaisons_."

"_Oui_." She said. "Now lay still."

Jerome rolled his eyes and got in the position he was in before. He was still an inch or two off from the original. Leia continued anyway. Jerome had this ashy red hair that was in disarray. He somehow always needed to get a haircut and a shave. His crooked smile came mostly from the right side. He had pale blue eyes, skin that was lightly dusted with freckles and high cheekbones. Leia drew his lips that were turning into a smile, his wide skinny lips.

"Stop smiling." Leia said annoyed.

"I don't want to. Aren't you done? I want to _baiser_."

Jerome and Leia had been sleeping together for the past few weeks. It helped that they lived in the same house and that he knew spoke some of the best English in the commune. Not to mention he was probably the most attractive boy her age. He fucked pretty well, played football, owned a car, and would buy her beer.

Leia looked down at her hands. They were black. She had been drawing with vine charcoal, a brittle material that would crumble into dust and always turned her hands black. Her drawing, an assignment in her art class, was close enough to being finished. She put her sketchbook down, and climbed on the bed and sat between his legs.

She grabbed his face and pulled him in, marking his skin with a black handprint. Their tongues wound together automatically and he eased his hand down Leia's jeans to feel her through her underwear. Leia broke away to gasp and Jerome whispered in her ear.

"You know you don't need to masturbate anymore, because I am just across the hall. I am always ready."

Leia chuckled a little. Jerome was a horny bastard. But with such a small population, he didn't have many options for women. She guessed that he enjoyed knowing he lives with someone who will fuck him with little emotional attachment. She couldn't blame him, the feeling was mutual.

She grabbed his white t-shirt and pulled it towards her. She loved feeling the roughness of his face against hers. What she loved even more feeling the roughness of his face on her inner thighs. It was strange living with someone she slept with, especially with her family there. She would go to breakfast every morning to find the blue eyes that had looked up at her so eagerly while eating her out the night before. Or she'd see him walk to his room after taking a shower, in only a towel, and she'd know exactly what he looked like without it. She figured her brother probably realized something was happening but he never said anything. Her parents would have freaked if they knew. She was pretty sure they thought she was still a virgin. How wrong they were.

The moment Leia's hips started grinding into his hand Jerome pulled his hand out and started to unbutton her jeans. She pulled off his shirt and made black charcoal marks along his skin. She had to get off the bed to pull of her jeans, and she helped pull his off, along with his briefs. They found themselves on the bed again, with Jerome over her. He peeled off her t-shirt and his face went immediately to the valley between her breasts. Leia gasped as she felt his slight stubble against her breasts. He threw her bra across the room to tease her nipples. His hands and mouth alternated between them as Leia made scratches down his back.

"_Baise-moi._" She gasped as he bit down especially hard on her left nipple.

Jerome smirked and moved her legs so her knees would be resting on his shoulders as he aligned himself. He grabbed the bedpost behind her and entered her slowly. Leia loved looking at him like this: his eyes rolling in the back of his head, his mouth opening a little... but this time his face and body were smudged with patches of black charcoal from her art project. Smudges that had gotten on both of them.

She moaned at the angle his cock hit, and urged him to move. He started to move slowly, and she matched every one of his trusts.

"_Plus vite._" She commanded.

He started a faster momentum abruptly. Leia wasn't fully prepared for it. The bed was rocking erratically and she was shaking. She felt herself fluttering and unable to meet him. He started teasing her clit and chanting her name 'Ashley' over and over again. She lost the ability to keep her eyes open as she rushed over the edge.

"_Je Viens!_" She shouted as she came hard.

Jerome only increased his speed more, causing Leia to dig her nails so deep into his back he bled.

"Près." He whispered as he adjusted her legs a little higher and leaned over her a little more.

Leia felt another orgasm coming over her as he reached his. Jerome let out a loud cry as he came, while his whole body shuttered. He pulled out immediately after and let her legs down. His body crashed next to her as they both caught their breath. Some sticky cum had gotten on her and the sheets.

"What are you hiding from?" He asked quietly after a moment.

He knew the story: Leia's mother, Olivia had some mob involvement when she was younger and it had come back to haunt her. The "Stuarts" would be here until it blew over. Only Hugo, Jerome's father, knew their real names. Luckily they were muggles so even Hugo didn't know the real story.

"You know why my family has to be here." She said calmly. This is the first time he had brought this up.

"I know the story you told… but you are the most, not scared, but _comment dites-vous parano_?"

"Paranoid?"

"_Oui_, _oui_, _oui_… so why is this? They are looking for your mother, but not you? _Oui_?"

For a jock, Jerome was intuitive. And he was right. Leia was extremely paranoid. Every sound, every footstep could be a Death Eater coming to kill her family. What's worse is that Leia had realized that they would probably kill the Belaires too. How would the police cover it? How do police cover magical murders? Two families died from inexplicable events? Or maybe they'd just say there was a leaking gas in the house, and they all died from breathing in deadly toxins. And Margo's so young…

Beyond paranoia, she was missed Draco and worried about him on a daily basis. Maybe she hadn't loved him, but she'd cared about him. She feared that the Dark Lord was making him do terrible things and threatening Leia's life if he refused. And it worried her that she missed him. She missed an assassin. She missed a Death Eater. Sometimes, with Jerome, she'd imagine it was actually Draco but then she'd realize what she was doing and snap out of it. She had not grown out of the habit of using sex to avoid her feelings.

"I had a strange relationship with my ex-boyfriend." She said, not knowing why she was saying this out loud.

"From Kansas?" He asked. Only Hugo knew they were in London for the past two years.

"Yeah. His memory kind of haunts me."

"Does he know you are here?"

"No."

"Then he would never find you. He would never go looking in Saint-Glen."

Jerome was right about that. Draco would never look here. But he would go to Paris and search for her. Leia hadn't visited Paris in the months that she's been here for that reason. She thought it was too obvious. She thought Lupin or Hermione might contact her if they thought the Death Eaters were onto her, but she had heard nothing. Part of her wanted to leave it at "no news is good news," but what if both Hermione and Lupin had died? Then what if no one knows she was here, which could be good or bad.

"I know. But I have trouble detaching myself from him. He was intense."

"Did he hurt you?"

"He hurt me by hurting someone else."

"Ah, I see. Is his name Drake or something?"

"W-what makes you say that." Leia said in a moment of terror.

"You called his name once. In your sleep. You were crying. When I went to into your room you had stopped."

"Oh."

Leia know what to say. But she was scared she'd give herself away in her sleep.

"Have I said anything else in my sleep?"

"_Non_. That was the only time."

Leia was quiet. She wondered if she would ever tell Jerome about Draco, the real story. She worried that she might be forced to live with the Belaires for years. She worried that she would spend the rest of her life here. What if she ended up marrying Jerome? What if they had kids? What if they were wizards?

What would she tell Jerome then?


	5. Chapter 5

My Way Home by Kanye West ft Common

* * *

There was some light snow on the ground outside. Leia didn't really enjoy the snow anymore though. This was supposed to be a new year, new opportunities, less fears. But her fear and anxiety kept on growing with time. She looked outside her bedroom window. Her room had a view of the front yard. She was surprised when a car she didn't recognize rolled up the drive. It was old, black, and British, a Bentley from the sixties.

_Death Eaters wouldn't use cars, right?_

Her heart beating a thousand miles an hour, she grabbed her wand, and hid it in her jeans. They were baggier, so she could conceal it. She walked down the stairs slowly. Only she and her mother were at home.

_Would they go out looking for my father, brother, and the Belaires?_

The doorbell rang, something that rarely happened. If they ever had visitors, it would be people who would just walk in. These visitors were not from here. Her mother came out of the kitchen and looked at Leia with confusion. Leia motioned for her to get back, and her mother hid in the coat closet. Leia went to the door slowly, unfortunately there was no peephole.

_Would Death Eaters even ring the doorbell?_

She turned the doorknob slowly, and only opened the door a crack so she could see out. She froze when she saw the visitors.

"Allison, may we come in?" asked Neville Longbottom.

"How do I know it's you?"

"You punched me in the face and broke my nose fifth year. Not that I'm bitter, though!"

"I gave your brother train fair once."

"Okay…" she said but she was still cautious. Next to Neville stood Lupin, both of them looked scratched up. She led them into the living room. Her hands were shaking and her mind was reeling on what news they would come in person to tell her. Did Hermione die? Did we lose already?

"Mom, you can come out, they're friends." She said walking over to the locked closet.

Her mother stepped out of the closet with a sigh of relief.

"Oh, thank god. I was so scared this would be it." She said looking at the guests.

"Um, this is R-" Leia started to say.

"Richard Finnegan, and my son Nicholas Finnegan. We are from The Order."

"Yes, I remember meeting you before, Richard. Can I get either of you coffee or tea?" Her mother asked, wanting to do something with her hands that were still shaky. Leia was confused but didn't show it.

"I'd love a coffee, Mrs. Stuart." Lupin said politely.

"The Belaires aren't here. Call me Olivia until someone else walks in. How do you take your coffee?" She said slightly laughing politely.

"Black." Lupin replied smiling.

"And for you, Nicholas?" Olivia asked politely.

"I'm fine, mum."

Olivia nodded and walked into the kitchen, still trying to get her breathing back to its normal speed. Leia sat down across from them.

"Fake names?" Leia whispered.

"It's best if she doesn't know." Lupin whispered back. Leia nodded.

"What's the news?" Leia asked in a more causal tone, terrified to know the answer.

"Things have gotten worse, as expected." Lupin said sighing. A part of Leia died when she realized that they weren't here to tell her that the war is over. "The Death Eaters have infiltrated the ministry. The Order has fought them on a few occasions. Mad-Eye Moody was killed. George Weasely lost an ear. Most of the Order is in hiding."

"You've come to France to tell me this?"

"Snape is headmaster at Hogwarts." Neville blurted out. "He left the Order once school started. You know muggleborns weren't allowed back this year? And now Death Eaters, the Carrows, are teaching. One of them is teaching Dark Arts, the other Muggle studies. They're in charge of discipline, and they use physical means. They're making us use the unforgivable curses on first years. All of the scars on my face were given to me by either one of them. It's awful."

"Did you ever tell Snape about my location?" Leia asked in a low voice.

"We haven't had any contact with him since we last spoke with you." Lupin said sadly.

"Here's your coffee, Richard." Olivia said as she sat down next to her daughter.

"Mom, this is a private conversation." Leia told her mother quietly.

"Well, actually if there is any news that means you or our family will be moving from this house, I am going to be in that conversation. You are my daughter, and I am going to be a part of that decision." Leia's mother spoke steadily, but Leia could still feel the fear in her voice.

"Olivia, for your safety, it is best you not be in this conversation. You should make it so you can't hear what we're saying, and the same for anyone else in this house." Lupin said in a deep tone.

Olivia looked like she was about to cry. She bit her lip.

"Okay." She said as she stood up. When she had walked up the stairs, Lupin cast a silencing spell.

"What we are offering, you, is a job position of sorts." Lupin said in an even tone, trying not to scare Leia.

"Go on…" Leia said curiously.

"As you have heard, at Hogwarts there are a great number of students who are injured as punishment by their teachers. The hospital wing has become overrun. Madam Pomfrey cannot help all of the students who need it. She is forced to focus on those who are in the most critical conditions, but it means there are a good number of students who don't get the proper care. Snape has refused Madam Pomfrey's request that there be another nurse in charge. He has also canceled Healing as a course. It's as if he wants a number of students to not get the help they need. He's gone so far as request that some students are not offered medical care, as a further punishment."

"Snape would never hire me as an assistant nurse if that's what you're getting at."

"That's right, Snape would never let you inside the building other than to have you captured. So, Madam Pomfrey and Neville have come up with a plan." Lupin said as he turned to Neville.

"Since you've left, the DA has taken over the Room of Requirement, the only room that the Carrows can't regulate. The Room of Requirement now has a secret passage that connects Hogwarts to Hog's Head. What we want to do is take you into Hogsmead, through the tunnel into the room of requirement. From there the room would become a second hospital wing for all of the patients Madam Pomfrey can't handle. You'll be the acting nurse."

"Slow down, so I would have to live in the Room of Requirement. I couldn't go into Hogsmeade because then someone might recognize me." Leia said not buying this.

"Sort of. You could probably go to the Hog's Head when it's closed. It's owned by Aberforth Dumbledore, Albus's bother. I could imagine he would let you go there from time to time. But for the most part, yes, you would have to stay in the Room of Requirement. It would supply you with everything you need, other than food, but some house-elves have agreed to deliver you food." Neville said thoughtfully.

"Are you sure I'm trained for this? Why not ask a _trained_ adult to do it?"

"Madam Pomfrey said you were the only one she'd suggest. There aren't any other healers in the Order. You, by default, are the most qualified." Lupin said calmly.

"Besides that, if need be, we could disguise you as a student. An adult would be harder to hide." Neville said, agreeing with Lupin.

"When would I have to leave?"

"Hopefully today. Term starts tomorrow, and we'll need you." Neville said looking at Leia with pleading eyes.

"How would I get there?" Leia said, not believing she was asking that question.

"We would disguise you as Neville's grandmother. We have the polyjuice potion ready. You would go with Neville, stay at his house with his grandmother tonight, and on the train tomorrow into Hogsmeade and get in through the Hog's Head."

"You can get into Hogwarts without going on the Hogwart's express?"

"I've already talked to McGonagall about it. She understood why my grandmother would be hesitant for me to get on the Hogwarts Express again, after Death Eaters were on the train ride up a few months ago. I left for holiday from Hogsmeade station. I wasn't the only one." Neville replied.

"Does McGonagall know?"

"No. No one knows but the people in this room and Pomfrey." Lupin said seriously.

"I imagine word will get out the moment you enter the castle, but we'll have precautions set up in the Room of Requirement." Neville explained.

"Um, are _they_ looking for me?" She asked the question she feared most. The Death Eaters' plans for her hadn't been discussed yet.

Neville sighed and pulled out a poster with the slightly moving photo of a girl with a long face and black hair with a blank expression under the words "Have You Seen This Witch?"

"'Approach with extreme caution! Do not attempt to use magic against this witch! Any information leading to the arrest of this woman shall be duly rewarded. Notify immediately by owl the Ministry of Magic.'" Leia read aloud in a sad drawl. She was famous now.

"The exact same words they had on the poster for Sirius Black. Seems appropriate, as both of you have been charged with crimes you did not commit. They even have the same task force looking for you, The Witch Watchers." Lupin said somberly.

"On what charges?"

"They say you were a key player in the murder of Albus Dumbledore. They have them for Harry, Ron, and Hermione too, only Harry is 'Undesirable Number One.'" Lupin replied.

Leia felt a pang in her stomach.

_I might have been a key player in the murder of Albus Dumbledore._

"What has happened to the Golden Trio?" Leia said ignoring her quivering chin.

"They've been in hiding, apparently working on an assignment that Dumbledore gave them specifically. I don't even know what it is or where they are." Lupin replied.

Leia nodded.

"Is my family safe here?"

"Yes. It is very unlikely they would find you here. You have taken the correct precautions." Lupin said looking towards the stairs, where Leia's mom went.

"Would they be safer without me?"

Lupin looked at Leia for a long time.

"It is hard to say. If you were found in the Room of Requirement, which is very unlikely, the Order could be there in minutes. However, it would be very difficult to protect you here. What I do know is that if they were to come here, to this house and you were not here, they would get the information they want out of your family members. They'll probably use veritaserum, and if your family genuinely didn't know you where you were, you have a chance they would just erase their memory and leave. But if they were to come to this house and find you, they would kill everyone in this house."

Leia let out a small cry and covered her face. It hurt so much to hear those words come out of someone's mouth.

"Obviously, it is of upmost importance that you do not tell anyone where you are going. Do not give them any clues to where you might be. Anything you tell them could be used against them. And you can't tell them who we are. The less information they have, the easier it will be."

Leia nodded. She knew she had to go. She looked up at them.

"W-when will we have to leave today?" She asked through tears.

"We could stay for dinner." Lupin said, looking upon the girl with sympathy. She breathed.

"Could I take my cat?" She asked feeling pathetic. It was the only pet she's ever had.

Lupin looked down at his feet for a moment in thought.

"Probably not."

Leia breathed deeply again. She'd really be alone.

"I'll pack my things. I'm sorry I can't really entertain you. You could watch French TV, I guess." Leia said pulling herself together and handing them the remote control.

"I've seen one of these before..." Neville said, looking with curiosity. Lupin seemed equally amused.

"I'll send word that you've agreed." Lupin said quietly, while sending out a patronus of an animal that Leia didn't catch.


	6. Chapter 6

Cruel World by Lana Del Rey

* * *

Leia, or now Augusta Longbottom, sat on the train next to Neville attempting not to cry again.

"Gran, don't cry again." Neville said as he reached out and held Leia's hand. Leia squeezed it a little.

"It's just now sinking in that this is happening." Leia said in her horrible old lady impression. Her voice just went up and down erratically. People might have been more skeptical were it not for her whole get up.

Leia spent the night at Neville's Grandmother's house. It was closer to a castle. Everything was old and overdone. Taxidermy everywhere. Leia loved the house. She wished she could spend her time there. Mrs. Longbottom was intense, but seemed to respect Leia for taking this responsibility. She loaned Leia an outfit, for the train ride and incase she ever needed to become Augusta Longbottom again. She did say that she expected these clothes back in perfect condition. Leia agreed, but had no idea how to care for a hat with a taxidermy vulture on it, or a large fox stole.

"If you are going to be me, I expect you to look good." She had said the night before.

Leia had a hard time relaxing on the train ride there, with the hat. Luckily it was only an hour and a half train ride.

"I'm scared." Leia whispered to Neville cautiously.

"We all are." He replied back.

Leia now covered her mouth that was covered Augusta's own bright red lipstick. She felt tears coming back again, but she breathed through it. Her brother's words from last night were ringing in her ears.

"YOU'RE ABANDONING US? WE MOVED TO FUCKING NOWHERE, FRANCE BECAUSE YOU FUCKED DRACO MALFOY, AND NOW YOU'RE GOING TO _LEAVE_ US HERE?" he had shouted as she was leaving, the night before.

"DON'T YOU GET IT? YOU ARE SAFER HERE WITHOUT ME!" She had shouted back.

"WE HAD TO TURN OUR WHOLE LIVES UPSIDE-DOWN BECAUSE OF YOU! YOU PUT ALL OF OUR LIVES IN DANGER!"

At that point Leia was crying too hard to speak. She had cast a silencing spell a moment before he had started yelling in her bedroom. She had gone up to get her suitcase.

"If we die, would you even know?" He asked her in a quieter, but more disgusted tone. This was a thought that she hadn't considered yet, but she knew the answer.

"Probably not."

"I hate you." He said clearly through his teeth.

Luke and Leia had gotten into fights before, they're twins, but nothing to this level. Luke had never said 'I hate you' to Leia. Leia had never said 'I hate you' to Luke. This was a new low. It was a new pain that Leia hadn't felt before.

The rest of her family took it arguably well. Her mother cried, her father yelled a little in frustration that two men he didn't know where taking his daughter to somewhere he couldn't know. The Belaires wished her luck, but didn't understand why this was happening. They had made up the story that the Stuart daughter had gone to a boarding school for artists to tell the commune. Spock liked a tear from her cheek.

As she was walking out the door, Jerome grabbed her arm lightly and turned her face to him.

"I hope one day you can stop running." He said before kissing her lightly on the cheek.

"Me too." Ashley had said, whipping another tear from her eye.

When the train stopped, Leia took a small elegant flask out of Augusta's red handbag and drank some more polyjuice potion. She almost gaged, but kept it down.

She walked awkwardly with Neville in the direction of the Hog's Head. Many people were staring at her, a few waved. Leia just convinced herself that she could pull off looking prudish. Inside the Hog's Head, a large old man with a long white beard behind the bar nodded towards them. The place was empty other than one other patron, who was asleep. The man led Neville and Leia into a small back room that had a fire place and a huge painting of a girl in a field.

"I will come and get you as soon as I can. I have to get to Hogwarts." He said patting Leia's hand.

"Wait, you didn't say I would be waiting here. I thought I could just go through the passage." She said in her normal voice.

"Someone has to lead you through the passage. I'll get you as soon as I can." He said nodding, unfazed by her words. And like that, Neville stepped out of the room and left Leia alone with a rougher, bigger version of Dumbledore. He was currently lighting the fire.

She sat down at the only table in the room and set her bags down next to her. With her head in her hands, she leaned onto the table.

"I can bring you back some bread and butterbeer." He said standing from the fire, looking on her with slight pity, like seemingly everyone else on the planet. She made a face.

"I actually really hate butterbeer. Would it be awful of me to ask for something stronger? A glass of wine? Preferably dry and red? This has literally been the two worst days of my life." She said taking off the ridiculous hat and putting it on the chair next to her.

The man just looked at her and sighed a little before leaving the room. Leia whipped the dried tears from her cheeks and hoped the man hadn't lost all respect for her in four sentences. She sat and looked at the large painting above the fireplace, which was more beautiful that Leia had originally given it credit for. The girl swayed a little and looked so peaceful.

The man came back in with some bread and a bottle of wine. She sighed in relief, it was red.

"Thank you so much." She said staring at the man as he set the items down.

"Just don't tell anyone I gave wine to an under-aged witch." He said without laughter in his voice.

"Do you know who I am?"

"I know you are a former Hogwarts student who has come back to help Madam Pomfrey with injured students. And I know you've been in hiding. But I don't know your name."

"How did you know I'm not 18?"

"Just a hunch. I have to go see to my patrons. I close at around eleven, but I'll come back before that to check that you're not too pissed."

Leia rolled her eyes.

"You think I'll be here that long?" She asked, checking her watch that said it was seven-thirty.

"I have no idea." He said closing the door.

Leia opened the bottle of wine and poured herself a glass. It was good wine. She was glad he gave her the bottle.


	7. Chapter 7

Ribs by Lorde

* * *

The first thing Leia made in the Room of Requirement was a king size bed. She had changed clothes a while ago, back in the Hog's Head when the polyjuice wore off. She hopped on it face down and buried her body in the soft comforter. She had been waiting in the back room of the Hog's Head for four hours. She was exhausted by everything that had happened over the last thirty-six hours.

She was alone in the room with Neville, next to a large fireplace and the picture frame they came out of. It was a whimsical idea, a passage through a portrait. The room was large, the same size that they would use to practice DA meetings in two years ago. This time the room had mostly hospital beds, except for the one Leia was currently lying on. When she looked around the room, all of these memories flooded back that she had been trying to hide away. In that moment, she missed Draco with new pains. She also hated him equally. If it wasn't for him, she wouldn't have to be abandoning her family in the first place.

"So I guess I'll wish you a good night's sleep?" Neville said stepping away slowly.

Leia didn't want to be alone.

"Can't you stay for a while?" She asked, sitting up on her bed.

"Umm…" He hesitated.

"You don't have to, but is it too pathetic to say I'm lonely? I just kind of want to be in the presence of another human being for a little longer."

She looked at him with sad eyes. She didn't want him to feel obligated to hang out with her, but she really hated the idea of being only with herself at a time like this.

"I know the feeling." He said taking steps toward her.

She sat up on her bed better.

"Come sit. I promise I won't make any moves on ya." She said lightly. The embarrassing part was that Neville had gotten quite attractive since she first met him fifth year, and she would now totally fuck him. Part of her hoped she could seduce him tonight to prolong her "bury emotions with sex" habit. But she would try her hardest not to. Part of her thought he was a virgin, and she didn't want to get into that tonight.

He took his shoes off and sat on the edge of the bed facing her.

"Thanks. It's actually nice to talk to you again. It's been weird without you and Harry, Hermione and Ron."

"There must be a lot missing this year."

"There are. Even more didn't come back this semester."

"That's understandable. If my kid was being beaten as a punishment, I wouldn't let them back either."

"It's so sad to see this place that I've known and loved for so many years be destroyed."

"I can't imagine."

There was a moment of silence between the two. Leia knew she had to keep the conversation rolling so he wouldn't leave. She went ahead and said the next thing on her mind without thinking it through.

"You know, I don't think I've regretted anything more than punching you in the face. I'm so sorry, Neville." She said quite honestly. She covered her face with her hands a little in embarrassment.

Neville laughed.

"I've never had anyone apologize to hitting me before! I'll forgive you if you tell me one thing." He said with a mischievous grin on his face.

"Anything." She said with a grin to match.

"Why in the world would you, after running up to a practical stranger and punching them straight in the face, go and vomit in a bin? Tell me the string of events that led up to that."

Leia laughed. It felt good.

"This is an awful story, and I fully expect you to judge me very hard after hearing it. I actually remember it crystal clear. I went to the Valentine's Day ball with none other than the infamous Draco Malfoy. However, a week before the ball, my brother had sent me this flask with muggle vodka in it so I could enjoy myself. So, at the ball, my idea of a good time was to drink an embarrassing amount of vodka with Draco Malfoy. Keep in mind, at this time I had a very intense crush on Luna Lovegood, and I was using Draco Malfoy to distract my feelings for her."

"Really?" He said curiously.

"Yes, but the Luna and Leia chronicles is another story. So, towards the end of the ball, I tell Draco we should go off somewhere to be alone. And so Draco leads me to the Room of Requirement. In our drunken stupor, we fucked. When we woke up the next morning, Draco wanted to know the reason I had broken up with my last 'boyfriend'" she said using air quotes, "and his best friend Theodore Nott. So I tell him this exceptionally embarrassing story, that is again for another time, and we laugh. I then asked him what Theo had told him happened when we broke up. Draco told me that Theodore Nott told Draco's group of friends that he broke up with me when he learned my mother was a mudblood."

Leia paused for a moment as Neville looked at her sadly.

"Draco actually thought Theo had made that up, and so he told me not to worry, no one had spread that rumor around. I then asked him if this was a solid reason for ending a relationship, among his group. I asked him if it had happened before. He told me that it had, to other people, but not to him. He told me he had always taken precautions before, ya know. I then proceeded to tell him that my mother is, indeed, a muggleborn, and that even worse that my father is a squib. He said nothing, but looked at me dumb founded as I left."

Leia caught her breath again, to do the big finish.

"Walking outside the Room of Requirement, I see you. I mentally saw flashes of you with Luna the night before. I remember how happy Luna looked. She looked happier than I could ever make her. I thought about what a nice evening you two must have had. I don't actually remember mentally thinking 'I'm going to punch Neville Longbottom in the face.' My hands just kind of moved on their own in a blind rage. The next thing I remember is you on the floor with blood everywhere. All of my rational feelings hit me in the stomach and I realized what I had done. I immediately felt so bad. You had done nothing to hurt me, ever. I don't think you've really hurt anyone ever. You're probably the nicest person I know, and I just punched you in the face for no reason. And so I ran away. Then all of the alcohol and bad feelings of the last twelve hours hurdled itself out of my mouth. Luckily there was a trashcan."

Neville was silent again.

"But you were with him after that?"

"Of course. But even with all of the pain he caused me, I hurt him just as much if not more. However, he changed over the summer that year. I think getting the task really threw things into perspective for him. He had a new attitude after that. All of the hatred he felt towards impure blood deflated. I know for a fact he couldn't care less about it anymore. But he loved me, so much more than I could ever love him. He loved me tragically. And I stayed with him because I didn't know what else to do."

Neville visibly flinched when she mentioned the task. He was still reeling in the wake of Dumbledore's death.

"Did you love him?"

"Not in the same way, no. I loved who he was removed from our environment. I can honestly say that if we were born in a different time or place, he would be my one great love. But here he's just my one tragic love. The context was wrong."

"He's been mopey this year. More than last year."

Leia's ears perked up.

"Does he look sick?"

"No, not like he did at the end of last year. Now he doesn't look as worried, he just looks depressed."

Leia was quiet again. She didn't know how to react to that.

"Do you still care about him?"

"In different ways. I'll worry that they're making him do terrible things and using me as a threat. But a huge part of me hates him for getting me and my family into this mess."

Neville nodded and looked at her intently.

"Was it worth it?"

"No." she said without hesitation. "Nothing was worth forcing my family to go into hiding. They now live in fear. Nothing is worth having to abandon my family now. If they died now, then I would have no idea. No one could notify me. I wouldn't know until years later. Draco-fucking-Malfoy is not worth that. Not even close."

"Who is Jerome… to you I mean." Neville asked, changing the subject.

"Some guy I lived in the same house with in a small French commune for a few months. We were sort of together, but nothing serious. He spoke some of the best English in the commune. His purpose was to distract me from everything else."

"Just wondering… It looks like Draco's been in cahoots with Pansy."

"Did you just use the word 'cahoots'?"

"Yes."

"Good word. Really good word. I'm impressed."

"That's my goal out of this."

Leia laughed. It felt good to have someone to talk about all of this with. She couldn't talk to Jerome because of obvious reasons, and her brother was too harsh on her. She was quiet for a moment, hoping he wouldn't leave, but she also didn't want to keep him any longer.

"Neville, you don't need to stay here with me…" She said sadly.

"Have I overstayed my welcome?"

Leia chuckled.

"Oh, not at all, I just worry that I am keeping you from something."

"I have nothing. But if you want to sleep, I can leave."

Leia took a deep breath.

"I don't really want you to leave."

"I don't really want to leave."

Leia felt tears gather in her eyes.

"Thank you, Neville." She reached out her hand from one side of the bed to touch his. He grabbed hers and squeezed it. Neville was so comforting.

"How are you handling all of this?" She asked, not wanting to talk about herself the whole time.

"I'm alright. I just hate to stand by and have to watch first years come to Hogwarts, and with all of the excitement on their faces be forced to see the truth of what this place has become. They come here with so much wonder and then…"

Leia hadn't even considered the first year's impact. She had always had a secret soft spot for the 11 year-olds. They were all so determined. It's cute. She hated knowing that their childhood could be shattered so easily.

"Do any of them know what's going on?"

"Some have a better idea than others. Most are confused."

"What do you think will happen?"

Neville paused.

"I think we're stuck waiting until we hear more from Harry."

"More?"

"Oh, yes, you didn't get the news. Harry, Ron, and Hermione broke into the Ministry to steal some unknown object. They just barely escaped. Little information was ever published about it."

"I wonder what object was so important that they would risk stepping inside the Ministry."

"No one knows."

Leia was quiet again.

"Do the others know I'm here?"

"Other DA members?"

"Yeah, do they know I'm here?"

Leia hadn't considered the fact that many students might not be so happy to see her.

"I went ahead and told Ginny. Word will get out to other DA members, but we've secured the room to make it so no one who's against our cause can enter."

"Should I be worried some members won't be happy to see me?"

"I know Ginny is glad to hear that you're back."

Leia took that as 'Ginny is the only person other than me who would tolerate your presence after dating Dumbledore's assassin.' She was quiet again.

"Why did the Order offer me protection? I was in a romantic relationship with the guy who murdered Albus Dumbledore. Why aren't I black listed?"

"I've been asking myself the same question, no offense." Leia nodded, none taken. "I think someone had to fight for your safety."

"Who?"

"Your guess is as good as mine."

Leia groaned in frustration and leaned back onto her bed. Neville moved so he was lying next to her, a move that surprised Leia. She turned so they faced each other.

"I hate sleeping alone." Leia said in her quietest voice.

"It's okay." He replied with a sad smile and a tiny yawn.

"You're a good person Neville. Better than I've ever been."

Impending sleep started causing her eyes to droop.

"You're not that bad."

"Thanks." She whispered as she drifted off to sleep. Neville slowly followed after watching her eyes close.


	8. Chapter 8

Lost ft. Noname Gypsy by Chance the Rapper

* * *

A second year Ravenclaw, Peter Langley, had come in with some harsh burns on his arm from some horrible Dark Arts lesson. He came in here pretty frequently. He was short for his age and thin as a rail. His hair was the same color of his skin, pale, and he had large blue eyes and small lips. He was quiet, but extremely clever and witty. Leia had become good friends with him, but she wished he wasn't in here every other day. He was a constant target for both of the Carrows, probably because he was physically small and passive against violence. He seemed to still keep a somewhat positive attitude, like today, he seemed very content.

"Even though I come in here all of the time, you have to admit I'm pretty tough." He said wincing a little as Leia spread a burn paste liberally on his arm.

"I think it's _because_ you come in here all of the time that you're tough." She said laughing.

"But I don't think other people understand that I'm a tough guy. I'm just little."

"You should start punching people in the neck. Then they would know you're tough."

"But I'm not tall enough to punch people in the neck. I'd have to jump or something."

"You could punch them in the lower genitalia region."

"I wouldn't want my hands anywhere near their lower genitalia region." He said with a disgusted look on his face.

"Ugh, Peter you're right, as always… and I'm done with you. You're free." She said as the paste fully dissolved and his skin was healed.

"Free!" he said as he got up from the bed. "Bye Leia."

"Bye Peter. Hopefully I won't see you soon."

When he walked out the door, her smile faded. She was alone in the room again. Her hours were awkward because she'd either have a full room of patients to watch over or none at all. It was hard to predict when the Carrows would start hurting students, so she never knew when they would come rushing in.

She went into her corner of the room, which was hidden by a curtain, and laid down on her bed. She was crawling up the walls of this room, but knew she couldn't leave. The only place she had been outside of this room was back into the small room in the back of the Hog's Head to buy more wine off Aberforth. He seemed to pity her situation.

Her only excitement was when the guys would come in to do _Potterwatch_ occasionally. It was nice to hear Lee Jordan's voice again, something that was so oddly familiar to her, and Fred Weasley's face was always good to see. Most of the time their altercations were awkward, but a refreshing change of pace.

Luckily Neville kept bringing in books from the library for her. She had never asked or mentioned that she hadn't brought enough books to fully occupy her free time, but Neville seemed to know. He brought in the most random books too. Some on herbology, some on potions, some magic fairy tales, some history.

Some students, DA members, would come to visit her pretty regularly, outside of their injuries. For example, Ginny walked in a few minutes after Peter left.

"Ginny!" Leia said, perking up. It was always nice to talk to her because she was kind of catty, in a way that Leia appreciated. Ginny waved and let herself in.

"I hate Muggle Studies more than my period." She said plopping herself face down next to her on Leia's bed.

"Well, it makes you just as cranky as your period." Leia said lightly.

"I would rather _bleed out of my vagina_ then have Professor Alecto Carrow tell us how muggles are pigs over and over again. Even if she were right, we cover the same propaganda material over and over again."

"At least get some variety in your prejudice."

"Exactly." She said flipping herself over so she lay on her back. "So how long have you been a nurse here?"

"Six weeks."

"Alright, you've been here six weeks and you still haven't taken Neville's virginity? Come on already!"

Leia rolled her eyes.

"We don't even know if he's a virgin! And I don't know if I _want_ to take his virginity. That's such a weird concept, taking someone's first sexual experience. I might be a lot of things, but I'm not a thief, that's for sure."

Ginny laughed.

"So do you not want to sleep with him?"

"Well, I do, he's been such a great friend towards me and he really has amazing character. It doesn't hurt that he's gotten so attractive in the last year or so, but I'm sure he's figured it out that I use sex as a way to avoid my feelings and I don't think I want to use him in that way."

"He really likes you though. I can tell. It's killing him that he can't talk _about_ you all of the time, so instead he's here talking _to_ you all of the time."

Leia snorted.

"Well, other than you and Peter Langley, he is my number one visitor…"

"No, I will not have sex with you." Neville said professionally, later that night.

"What?" Leia asked, stunned. She had never been denied sex before. Leia Allen was 5 foot 7 inches, a size 4, 32C, with a symmetrical face, nice hair, and high cheekbones. More importantly, she had a vagina. These types of things rarely happened to someone of her stature.

"I said, no, I will not have sex with you." Neville repeated, getting off the bed.

"What? Why?" Leia felt like she just got punched in the stomach. "Is it because you're a virgin and you want your first time to be 'special'?" She said adding finger quotations.

That was a low blow, but Leia was not prepared for this type of rejection, or any type of rejection for that matter. Neville blushed furiously.

"It has nothing to do with that. You've told me openly that you use sex as a way to avoid your feelings. I'm not going to continue that cycle."

"But it's an _awesome_ cycle." She said sounding dumber and dumber as this conversation went on. Neville furrowed his brows at her comment.

"Is this a joke to you? Sex is a very private and intimate experience. It's not something to throw around."

"So, what, you think I'm a slut?" Leia said louder than she had intended.

Neville sighed.

"Of course I don't Leia. I just think you are in a very emotional place right now and that you're trying to use me to elevate some of that pain. I won't let you use me to self-medicate."

Leia was mad, really mad.

_How dare he assume that he understood what was happening in my life. He doesn't know anything about my life! He has no fucking idea what I'm going through right now. He's never even had sex before! Where the fuck does he get off thinking that he knows what's best for me?_

She felt angry tears start to come out of her eyes.

"Do you not like me?" She said feeling dumber than she's ever felt. Leia was never one to seek out approval from anyone, especially not from boys. She hated saying those words.

"Leia-" He started.

"Do you think I'm ugly?" She asked, hoping this act would ensure her one night of forgetting her troubles.

"Leia, I-"

"Do I repulse you that much?"

Leia thought she would be okay with pity sex in this case.

"BLOODY HELL, LEIA!" Neville shouted in fury.

Leia was taken aback. She did not expect this.

"I know what you're trying to do Leia-"

"W-what are you talking about?"

"DAMNIT! You will not _guilt_ me into having sex with you."

He saw right through her plan. She was silent for a moment.

"You realize, if not you, it'll be somebody else."

Leia could see the pain hitting Neville hard on the face. He swallowed and took a baby step forward. His mouth opened like he wanted to say something, but he closed it before he could. He looked away for a moment, trying to think. He looked back at her angrily. He closed his eyes for a second and when he opened them the anger was gone and replaced by worry. He walked back to Leia, who sat on the edge of the bed.

He leaned his head on her forehead while taking her hands.

"I'll only do this because I don't want anyone else to." He said quietly. "I'm selfish."

"I'm using your feelings against you." Leia replied. "I'm more selfish."

"I know."

He held her face as he kissed her gingerly. Leia slowly grabbed on to his shirt to pull him the tiniest bit closer. Leia bit lightly on his bottom lip to gain entrance to his mouth. She felt him gasp the tiniest bit as her tongue touched his. He tasted like October, like a warm spice, as she thought he would. She grabbed him from the back of his shirt to pull him flush against her. Her skin was hungry for warm body. Neville broke away and took a step back.

"I don't know what I'm doing. I think you're going to be disappointed."

Leia laughed and pretended like the last five minutes hadn't happened.

"I'll tell you what Neville, I love your honesty. Most people don't know what they're doing but will never admit it. But it's okay. I can teach you. Intimacy is a two way street, and every experience teaches both people something new. I will give you a tip: forget anything you've learned in porn or the media, because there is a huge difference between what looks good and what feels good. I'll tell you what works and what doesn't. Ask questions, I'll give you an answer."

Neville blushed like crazy.

"What should I do with my hands?" He asked, taking a step forward in between her knees.

"Touch me." She said throatily. "I don't like people touching my armpits, ears, belly button, or feet, and I don't do anal. So anywhere else."

"Good to know."

"Are you comfortable this way? Standing?"

"For now." He said before kissing her again with newfound confidence.

His hands went to the back of her legs and she wrapped her knees around him. Leia ground herself into him, and pulled his neck closer to her. He grabbed her ass to move her core into his own. She started crawling her fingers up Neville's shirt to find a surprisingly muscular chest. He pulled away for a moment, again.

"Can I take off your shirt?" He whispered.

"Yes." She whispered back. No one had ever asked her before.

He slowly peeled her t-shirt off her body and found her thin black bra staring back at him. She felt him get a bit harder.

"Can I-"

"Please." She said cutting him off.

He felt her through her bra, with large warm hands. Leia leaned back on her hands so he could get a better view. He pulled back the fabric and then put his mouth around a hard nipple. She moaned deeply and continued to grind herself into him. He continued to nibble for several more minutes, while playfully thumbing the other nipple, as Leia hastily tried to create more friction near her core.

"Now you're just _teasing_ me, Neville." Leia said deeply.

"What?" He asked, looking up with a hint of fear in his voice. She shivered from the absence of his mouth.

"I want more." She said moving her hand down her body. "Touch me here."

"Here?" He asked, replacing Leia's fingers where her core is.

"Let me show you." She said, moving forward to stand up. She slid her jeans and panties down her sides, and Neville looked away, embarrassed.

"Neville, you've been great." She said holding his face in front of her own. "You've made me impatient for more."

"Really?" He asked skeptically.

"Feel this." She said taking his hand and guiding it towards her. "Fell how wet I am for you."

She shutters as he feels her slickness.

"You like that?" he asked with a curious sexuality.

She nodded at his rough hands. She sank back into the bed while he explored her folds. Her hips started moving on their own accord, and she gripped the bed sheets.

"Neville-"

Her voice was cut off by a very clear knock at the door that magically appeared at the other side of the room. After nine o'clock at night, it was required that Leia open the door herself. The door would only appear if there was an emergency.

"Shit." She said as she grabbed her wand to summon all of her clothes back on. Neville gathered himself slightly as she ran over to the door. She took a second to stop panting, and then she opened it without bothering to check who it was.

Leia had to cover her mouth from screaming. On the floor, face down and bleeding, was a rather tall and skinny teenage boy. He was moaning and coughing up blood. She panicked and levitated Draco Malfoy into a hospital bed.


	9. Chapter 9

"Regret" by Fiona Apple

* * *

"What are you doing letting him in, you'll blow this entire operation!" Neville yelled as he saw Draco nearly passed out on a hospital bed.

"Calm down! I'll just erase his fucking memory! Anyway, the door only opens if the person has no intentions to rat us out." She spat back at her almost lover. "He's obviously very hurt!"

"I DON'T CARE IF HE'S DYING! HE'LL BLOW YOUR BLOODY COVER!"

"HE WON'T REMEMBER THIS ALTERCATION! IT DOESN'T MATTER!"

"HE KILLED DUMBLEDORE!"

Leia didn't have a response to that, and instead whispered "_Vulnera Sanentur_" to heal a wound coming from his shoulder. He opened his eyes after a moment and looked at Leia with a face she couldn't read. It was a mixture of bliss and crippling sadness.

"What happened?" She whispered.

"I wasn't doing very well in a private torcher lesson with Amycus Carrow, and he-" Draco said before wincing again.

"Dark magic on the shoulder?"

He nodded.

"He kicked me too... here." He said clutching his stomach as Leia summoned over some blood replenishing potion and a cup.

"Jesus." Leia whispered, noticing that Neville had become silent. "Drink." She added, holding the cup up to him while the bottle magically flew back to its spot in the cabinet.

"When can he leave?" Neville asked, angry.

"In an hour or so. His body needs to calm down." She said watching her former love suck down the potion. "I'm going to do a body scan on you, to make sure you aren't hurt anywhere else."

Draco looked at her confused, but nodded.

"I can't stand here and watch you help _him_." Neville spat.

"I can't have _you_ distracting me. This spell takes a lot of fucking concentration. Either shut up or get out."

"Fine." He said walking towards the door.

"See you tomorrow." Leia said softly as he shook his head at her. The door slammed and she turned to Draco, her wand at the ready.

"You two seem to get on." Draco said thoughtlessly.

"Be quiet, if you distract me during this spell I could potentially twist your arteries together and kill you instantly. I'm not kidding."

"It's not my fault if you find my _body_ distracting."

"I just said shut up or I could kill you instantly, remember?" She said trying to cover a smile.

"Point taken. Begin when you're ready." He nodded.

"Close your eyes, you'll probably fall asleep. I'll start at your feet. Don't move and say a word." She said as she moved to the end of the bed. He nodded and closed his eyes.

She took a deep breath. She had done a few of these now, but they always made her scared when she started. The spell itself causes the caster to physically rake through the entire body to make sure everything is functioning correctly. With this scan, a caster can detect everything from broken bones to pulled muscles, tumors, past injuries and illnesses, pregnancies, and more. It was most important to keep complete concentration, especially at the beginning. Once the caster was past the knee, the likelihood of the caster further injuring the patient is only 8.7%. She sighed.

"_Videre Corpus_." She said clearly.

His toes were intact, feet were normal aside his high arches. He had a blister on his left ankle, a miniscule crack in his right fibula that was probably from Quidditch, which was directly below his right ACL that showed signed that it had torn several years ago. His upper leg muscles were slightly overworked, and he had been treated chlamydia a few months prior. His liver's cell structure was damaged, and that meant he had been drinking more than normal. He had a two broken ribs on his left side, probably where Amycus Carrow had kicked him. His arms were normal, although he was probably going to have severe arthritis in his hands. The wound in his right shoulder had healed, but his neck and shoulder muscles were incredibly tense, probably from stress. He had a cavity in a molar, and he had not gotten his wisdom teeth removed. Lastly, there were chemical imbalances in his brain that were common in people with depression.

"Done" she said as he opened his eyes. He hadn't fallen asleep as most people do. Apparently it's an extremely calming sensation.

"So?" He said calmly.

"I better not have chlamydia."

"Do _I_ still have chlamydia?"

"No, but I see it was treated a few months ago."

"I got it from Pansy in October, who said she got it from some Ravenclaw. So you _probably_ don't have chlamydia." He said sighing. Leia rolled her eyes angrily.

"_Episkey_." Leia cast, healing his broken ribs.

"Ahh." He said in a high-pitched voice. "That feels much better."

"You had two broken ribs."

"That makes sense."

"You've drinking a lot lately and you're liver has taken a beating from it, you're going to get arthritis in your hands, and you have a cavity." Leia didn't mention the depression part. He probably already knew about that.

"Do you do dental?"

"No. Talk to Hermione's parents." She said summoning some calming drought. She poured it into his cup. "Your muscles are so tense. Drink this."

"I have a high tolerance for Calming Drought." He said.

"Why? How do you know?"

"My mom gave it to me a lot as a kid, and since I've built up a strong tolerance. I'll drink it, but it won't do much."

"I've already poured it."

He took it like a shot and looked back at her.

"I've heard rumors that you were hiding in the castle, helping students, and that no one could prove it."

"No one can. Anyone who wants to turn me in doesn't gain entrance."

"I messed up that private session on purpose so I would have a reason to find out."

"Draco! He broke two of your ribs! What if you were seriously injured and no one could get to you?"

"Then I'd know you weren't here."

"You realized I'm going to have to erase your memory anyway."

"Then I might be back tomorrow."

"You ass." She said grumbling. He reached out and touched her hand. He sniffed in the air, then leaned in closer and sniffed her again.

"You smell like foreplay..." He said before he gasped, "you were about to fuck Neville Longbottom, weren't you?!"

"He's grown into himself in the last year." She said defensively.

"You've gotten to the point where you have to fuck _Shlong-bottom_?"

Draco actually seemed amused, rather than angry like Leia would have expected.

"I could do worse."

"Is his butt weird?"

"What?"

"I just always wondered if his butt was really long."

"Normal butt as far as I could tell. We didn't get very far."

"Were you about to take his virginity?"

"Uh, maybe…" She said looking away.

"I feel so bad! Longbottom must really hate me now. I mean, I've been an arse to him for my entire life, I'm a death-eater, and now I'm a cockblocker! Ugh, I pity him."

Leia laughed at how casually Draco called himself a death-eater.

"He might just come back in here and kill you."

"I would kill me if I were him." He said chuckling, before he leaned in to whisper in her ear. "It really turns me on to hear how frustrated you are that you would throw yourself at him."

Leia leaned back and was quiet for a moment. She looked around the room vacantly, as if the words were written on some arbitrary part of the room. It was odd how up to this point everything felt like nothing had changed. They were back to where they were a year ago, whispering jokes to each other on the Slytherin couch. But things had changed. Their eyes met, but in almost an aggressive way.

"You hurt me so badly, Draco. You caused my family to go into hiding, and I have to fear for their lives every day. You realize that, other than me, only a three people know where my family is right now. And my family has no way of contacting me. So if they were to die, I wouldn't know. I would only find out years later, if I survive the war." His eyes were filling with guilty tears. "If they have to move, I might never find out. Then I might never see them again. I'm so scared, Draco. You've made me become so scared. I haven't been outside this room in _six weeks_. There is no way I'm going to have sex with you. I don't find you sexy anymore."

Draco looked more hurt than she had ever seen him before. Intimacy was so important to both of them.

"Leia, I warned you that I would do something horrible-"

"You warned me I would hate you, not that you were going to fucking _assassinate_ someone. How the fuck was I supposed to predict that?"

"You did, a few times. Theo had to erase your memory."

"You _knew_?"

Both were silent. Leia was trying out the Occumentcy lessons that Neville and Ginny had been giving her.

"It's working. I can't get in your head." He said frustrated. "I'm so sorry, Leia. I-I love you so much."

"You let me date an assassin, you let me have my memory be altered without my knowledge, and then you put my family and I into a position where we have to go into hiding, and now you say you _love_ me? You're full of shit."

"You said you wouldn't hate me until I hated you-"

"That was before I found out about this shit." She said, starting to shout.

"What the bloody hell did you expect? I have the death eater tattoo, and I _warned_ you that you were going to hate me! Was that not obvious?"

"I thought you were the death eater's letter carrier or something. I didn't expect You-Know-Who to put all of his trust in a 16 year old. And when the other attempts happened, I assumed it wasn't you because I thought you were too smart to try those pathetic excuses for assassination attempts. I was wrong."

"He was going to kill everyone! Me, my family, and YOU." He said standing up and shouting the last word.

"Yeah, you put me in that situation. They would have killed me because you _let_ me get that close to you. That first fucking night, when Pansy put mud in my bed, you could have ended it there and I would be living with my family right now. How could you drag me into this?"

"BECAUSE I AM A SELFISH AND I LOVE YOU." He bellowed. They were both quiet after that. Both searing with rage and staring into each other's faces. Leia noticed Draco was resisting the urge to pounce on her.

"Did you mean it when you said you loved me?" Draco finally asked, taking a step back.

"I don't know."

He turned to exit the room.

"Wait." Leia said against her better judgement.

Draco stood with his back facing her. They were both quiet for a moment. Leia hadn't planned on saying anything. She had thought she would let him go, but she couldn't.

"I feel so alone." She said. Draco could have said the same thing. She hated being this vulnerable in front of him.

He turned and walked to her. He leaned his forehead on hers.

"Please let me." Draco said.

Leia knew she would regret this. She knew she'd hate herself. She knew Neville would find out and hold it against her. Everyone might find out. But she hadn't felt like a real person in a long time.

She kissed him.

They crumbled to the floor and pealed the clothes off each other and made sure to touch every part of each other. She pretended like they were in a different place and a different time, like they were in their own bubble where nothing else could touch them. She came, too quickly, and her body shook pressed against his. He finished and they tried to stick together as long as possible.

When Leia looked up to see his face, she cried. She hid her face in his chest so he wouldn't have to see her own fear and shame.

Draco pushed away from her when he felt her tears. He refused to look at her as he dressed and she sobbed.

"You always managed to make me feel like shit for who I am." he said "Don't worry about me coming back."

When Draco reached the door, he waited a moment for her to grab her wand. Leia put on her tshirt and scrambled for her wand and pointed it at his back.

"_Obliviate_." She whispered as she quickly opened the door and pushed Draco out before closing it. She knew he would be a little loopy for a few minutes, so he wouldn't remember being pushed out. She stood staring at the door for a long while. She hadn't wanted it to happen this way. She rubbed tears off her cheeks.

Her eyes wandered to the calendar that hung next to the door. Of course it was Valentine's Day.


	10. Chapter 10

Down Boy by Yeah Yeah Yeahs

* * *

It had been about a month since Draco had wondered in and he hadn't come back. Leia wondered if he remembered being hurt and then found himself fixed, and put together the pieces that she must be inside the castle. That must be enough for him, to think that she was there and helped him when he was injured. The only problem was if she were to ever see him again then they would have the same fight they had before. Leia was dreading it.

"So you haven't noticed Draco looking odd?" She asked Neville again, the same question in different words. She worried about him.

"Gods, for the last time, no. His body language is the same as it was before. He's given no indication that he remembers anything from that night."

"I'm sorry, just living in a room for two and a half months has made me paranoid…" She said, admitting her anxiety for the first time.

"Really?" Neville asked, sitting on an unused hospital bed.

"Yeah, every time the door opens I panic that it's a death eater. My anxiety was bad in France, but here is so much worse. I've had like three panic attacks in the last two weeks." She said lying on a neighboring unused hospital bed. The Room of Requirement was empty except for the two. It was too big without sick and injured students.

"I'm sorry. I feel responsible for putting you in this mess."

"It's not your fault I guess… Where's Ginny?" Leia asked absentmindedly.

"Don't you know? It's Easter holiday."

"Shit, it is. What day is it?"

"Tuesday."

Leia blinked, surprised. She hadn't been keeping track of the days as well as she'd thought.

"That explains why no one's been here for the past four days… We'll probably have even less students come back from holiday."

"That's what I figure. I feel bad for the kids who don't get to get out of this mess for a week."

"Like you?"

Neville laughed.

"Well I figured without me you wouldn't have anyone to talk to. I'd hate for you to get too lonely."

"You'll be sick of me by the time this week is over." She said smiling. "We'll have nothing to talk about by tomorrow."

"I'm sure we'll think of something. We've have many topics we've never discussed."

"Like?"

"What do you plan on doing after the war?"

Leia was quiet.

"That's such a strange question, because I'd have to be arrogant enough to believe that I'll survive and that we'll win. And I don't feel certainty either way."

"You don't think the good will triumph over evil?"

"I don't know anymore. For a while in France I was getting used to the idea that I'd live there for the rest of my life and probably marry Jerome. I'm scared."

Neville got off of his bed and made the gesture for her to make room for him. She obliged, feeling his body heat next to her as they looked up at the castle ceiling.

"But what if we _do_ win?" He asked in a small voice slightly above a whisper.

"Well I'm getting the fuck out of England."

Neville snorted.

"Is it that bad?"

"The country isn't terrible, I just need to get away from all of this shit. I'll probably go back to New York. Maybe I'll work at a magazine or something."

"No more magic?"

"Ugh, no, never again."

"What if you marry a muggle? How will you deal if your children come out wizards?"

"I have no idea, but with my genes, hopefully the wizard strand gets lost in the mix. But I don't know if I'll ever have kids. What about you?"

"I feel the same. Part of me thinks I would like to teach herbology post war, but I would never want to be responsible for raising a human."

"It's a lot of pressure to be a parent. But you would be a great teacher."

"Thank you." He said humbly. "After this year with the Carrows… I feel the need to make sure kids can go to Hogwarts and get an education. I don't want to stand by and hope that things will fix themselves."

Leia thought quietly for a second.

"You really are a Gryffindor, Neville. More than you'll know."

He laughed.

"You know, there are moments I'm surprised you were put in Slytherin. I always felt like you were one of us."

Leia laughed, dryly.

"I wish I could say the same. I mean, there were so many nights where I hated going back down to the dungeons to have to sleep next to people who were apparently kindred spirits. I felt like I had nothing in common with them and I would wonder why it was that the sorting hat put me here. I remember he was grappling between Ravenclaw, Gryffindor, and Slytherin and then I told him to hurry up. I was so cranky back then… so maybe that's why, or maybe because the sorting hat could tell I'm always thinking about myself. I'm such a selfish person, and a coward on top of that. I mean, I'll stand up for myself, but that's so no one can see me vulnerable. And I'm pretty stupid too, so yeah, I'm definitely a Slytherin."

Leia wished she could laugh at her own honesty.

"But you're not a coward…" Neville breathed, before pausing to gather his thoughts. "You've come back to Hogwarts, twice, after something terrible has happened to you, all for the cause. That has to say something."

"I wish that was bravery that brought me back here. Coming back for sixth year was half because Harry told me to and half because I had feelings for Draco. I was able to distract myself to what Pansy put me through by throwing myself into whatever came by first. That happened to be Draco. And now I'm back, not because of bravery, but of fear of my family's safety."

Neville slid his hand into hers and squeezed it a little. For the first time in a long time, she felt almost safe.

"I don't care if you're a coward." She could hear the smile in his voice. "I've never thought that about anyone before."

"I'm honored. Thank you." She responded with more honesty than she had expected.

Leia closed her eyes to revel in the moment. When she opened them Neville had moved to hovering over her. His eyes were black and she could tell he was ready. This was a bolder Neville that she had never seen before.

"I want to have sex with you." He said in a deep voice. She liked it.

"I'd thought you'd never ask." She said coyly through her eyelashes.

"I'm not asking. I'm tired of asking for everything my entire life. Tonight I'm taking."

Leia was surprised at how arousing his words were to her.

"If you don't want this, tell me to stop." He said centimeters away from her lips.

After a beat he kissed her, hard. He put all of his weight and passion and lust into that kiss. It was aggressive, a word that had never been used to describe Neville Longbottom until this point. When she tried to reach up and grab him, he used his breathing time to use his wand to pin her wrists above her head. She gasped and felt herself getting wetter.

Also in that moment he removed all of her clothing with a wave of his wand. She quivered a little at the sudden coldness as he ate her body with his eyes.

"No fair." She said as she looked at how much clothing he was wearing.

"No talking unless I tell you to." He said shaking his finger in front of his face. Leia's mouth curled into a smile as she nodded her head. With a third wave of his wand her legs were spread and tied to the bed posts.

As a single finger attached itself to her clitoris, which he found without issue, his mouth was attached to her left breast while he thumbed the other one. Leia twitched from under him and shifted in frustration. She had never experimented with restraints, even though Jerome had talked about it.

Neville started swirling his tongue in rough circles down her tummy. His finger stopped moving as he was breathes away from her core. He peeked his eyes over her and smiled when he saw the desperate look in her eyes.

"You look so pretty from this angle." He quipped as he inserted a finger inside her, slowly, not going in any more than halfway. She squirmed a little under him. Only centimeters away from her pulsing labia, her breathing increased with ever tantalizing second.

"You've been good, how about you tell me what you want?" He said sweetly as he removed the finger.

"I want you to eat me out and then fuck me blind."

"Hmmm, beg for it."

Leia Allen had never _begged_ for anything in her life.

"Please." She breathed.

"Pardon me, miss? Would you please speak up?"

"Please, Neville." Leia said in a normal speaking voice.

"Please what?"

"Please Neville, make me cum." She said with desperation in her eyes.

"Say it again."

"Please Neville, make me cum."

"Louder."

Leia was incredibly impatient.

"FOR FUCKS SAKE, PLEASE NEVILLE, MAKE ME-" She was cut off by her own gasp as he started sucking down hard on her sensitive nub. Her body felt so sensitive that she was immediately on the verge of orgasm as he inserted two fingers inside her roughly. Fire shot through her body and stayed at her center and in her feet. Neville had obviously had this planned out for a long time.

Neville's tongue traced all of her insides as his fingers continued to pound away at her. It was only when he returned to her clitoris, was she so close to the brink of orgasm, and he pulled out and stepped away. Leia let out a loud whimper, but was afraid to say anymore.

"Not yet, Leia." He said in a soothing but almost scary voice.

It was time for Neville to take off his clothes, but he didn't do it magically. He spent thoughtful moments unbuttoning and unzipping. He was slow and calculated, which was driving Leia wild. She was ready to cum a few minutes ago, and Neville's body had really developed in the last year. His cock was a nice roughly, 8 inches. He stood in front of her again, this time stark naked, with an intense look on his face. He waved his wand again, only this time it felt like there was a very powerful vibrator right on her clit. Leia's eyes popped out of her head as she cried out, and her limbs shook within their constraints. She could feel all this tension in her neck as Neville entered her slowly. She couldn't keep her eyes open as her orgasm blossomed out of her. Neville pumped in and out of her and came quickly, as virgins do.

"Stop the spell-it's too much" Leia gasped and Neville waved his wand again and her limbs were free and body went still.

Neville crashed next to her face down and they both spent a good five minutes in near silence, the only noise were their shallow breaths.

"Was that good?" Neville asked into the pillow.

Leia laughed loudly.

"Fucking shit, Neville."

"What does that mean?"

"That was fucking intense. So yeah, I'd say it was pretty good." Leia said laughing with her hands over her face.

Neville sat up a little and rested his head on his hand.

"Well, you seemed to enjoy it."

"Where did you learn to do that?"

"I read. A lot."

"That was crazy. I am so tired and I couldn't even move."

"This week should be fun." Neville said, kissing her forehead and then lying down. They both fell asleep quickly.


	11. Chapter 11

Leia was sitting, mending a wound on some fourth year, Thom Greenfield, when Neville came over. It was an exciting day already. The buzz had been that the golden trio had snuck into Grenegotts and flown out on a dragon. The only time that Leia got away from it was when she sprinkled some dittany onto the forth year's arm, which was probably not Carrow related. Leia had suspected that a few of the younger kids, specifically the ones who didn't quite grasp her actions that occurred last year, had a crush on her. A handful seemed to come in with wounds and scrapes that probably weren't worth her time. Honestly, she wasn't too fazed by the extra visitors, because she craved as much human contact as possible. No one knew about her relationship with Neville, but she was sure if Ginny was there, she'd know within three minutes.

"H-how are you today, Leia?" Thom asked as she finished up.

"Good, good, we've got good news from Harry, so things should be getting better." She said unconvincingly. The possibility of the war heating up terrified her and she couldn't imagine what she would do over the summer break, which was fast approaching. What if the Order wanted her to do something more? What if they forgot about her?

"Leia." Neville said, pulling on her arm and turning her to his tense but excited face. "They've been spotted in Hogsmeade."

"They?" Leia asked, already knowing the answer.

"Harry, Ron, and Hermione. I'm going to go meet them through the tunnel, gather everyone. Send out a patronus to the other members. I'll be back in a minute." He said, starting to walk towards the portal.

"Kay, sure." Leia said silently wondering if she should be the one going through the tunnel, considering she had lived there for longer than he had. Neville was expelled two weeks ago and he was living her with Leia. She was tired of seeing his face everywhere and he had gotten cabin fever faster than she did. Their relationship was definitely not going to last.

Looking around, most of the D.A. members were in the room camping out in there for whatever reason. Leia thought of the moment at the Three Broomsticks where she saw Eugene Gray for the first time in two years, as she opened a window in the Room of Requirement for the first time. Neville had taught her how to send messages using a patronus, and she remembered them as her panther rolled out of wand and onto the countryside. She had sent it to Lupin. He'd know what to do.

In that same moment, she heated up the coin and within moments, more DA members filed through the doors.

"What's up, where's Neville?" Dean Thomas asked as he walked through the passage. The room became nearly silent, and waited for Leia to tell them the news.

"Um, Neville is bringing back a surprise from Aberforth, and you guys need to be here to see it." She responded, yelling so the whole room could hear her response. Her voice was shakier than she had expected it to be. She was nervous and had a feeling that Harry would not be happy to see her. He must still feel betrayal from her.

Before she had another moment to think, everyone gathered around the passage gasped as Neville walked through and the three heroes entered the room. Everyone cheered, but Leia's paranoia made her silent. She hung out off to one side, hoping to blend in with the background.

"It's so great to see everyone!" Harry said, greeting his old friends. Ron did the same, but Hermione seemed to be scanning the room for someone. Her eyes stopped when they finally landed on Leia. Leia's stomach dropped.

"Leia!" She shouted and the room became silent. Apparently the rest of the room had the same tenseness as she did. Leia waved back, and the small sea of people moved as Harry walked through to make his way to Leia. He stood before her, looking rough. He had a stain on his shirt and his collar was buttoned incorrectly.

Both were silent as they looked at each other. Leia couldn't read his eyes, but she was sure he saw the fear in hers. She broke eye contact and took quick steps towards him.

"What the fuck happened to your shirt?" Leia said in a hushed tone as she started fixing the top few buttons of his shirt. Harry coughed as he laughed.

"I can't thank you enough for your sacrifice these last months. Neville was telling us just now. But I'm afraid we'll need you tonight, Leia. More than ever." He said just to her.

"It's happening tonight," she started as she took a step back while brushing some dirt off his shoulder, "isn't it? Here, no less?"

"You'll be invaluable. I've always believed in you."

She knew why the Order had helped her. Harry had fought for her.

Leia nodded, as Hermione came over to silently hug her. The broke apart and Ron waved half-heartedly.

"What do you need?" She asked. Harry turned to address the room.


	12. Chapter 12

Cold War by Janelle Monae

"Werewolf" by Fiona Apple

* * *

"Fuck," Leia repeated frantically, several hours after the Golden Trio walked through the portrait hole. A sixth year's arm had been ripped open by something, and Leia would be a better nurse if her hands would stop shaking. For the past hours, which felt like long minutes, she had been making her way from student to student and quickly mending wounds. She lost count of how many bodies she had found lying among the castle's rubble. When people die, they really do shit themselves. Leia learned this the hard way.

There were a number of people she hadn't seen recently, who she feared would be dead. She had briefly spoken with Lupin when he first arrived, but she hadn't seen him since. The last time she saw a Weasley or Hermione seemed like ages ago. Hopefully Astoria had convinced Theo to go with the Slytherins to safety… She thought she saw Harry briefly, but she wasn't completely sure.

She looked up to a noise, a girl too young to be here, was attempting to fight off some death eater.

"_STUPEFY_." Leia yelled, hurtling the death eater out the stained glass window behind him. The student looked at Leia stunned. Leia got up, as the wounded sixth year sprinted away, and looked out the window. The death eater's body had been caught on the roof of another window below. The large spike at the end of the window's roof had pierced his chest.

_I just killed someone._

By the time she looked around for the younger girl, Leia was alone in the hallway. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply to keep herself from vomiting. She ended someone's life. That was someone's kid. Maybe they had a kid. That could have been anyone. Unwelcomed tears rolled down her cheeks as she wiped them away seconds later. She wasn't a soldier.

The girl who was too young was gone, hopefully to safety. With one hand to wipe away tears and the other to hold out a shaky wand, she walked down the hallway and turned a corner. Some person whimpering in pain was sitting against a stone wall. She saw the blood on the stone floor before she saw who it was, and rushed over anyway.

The blood was from the sword-like wounds on his abdomen. Leia took out her vial of Essence of Dittany and applied it to the open wounds. The bleeding stopped immediately, but the wounds wouldn't be completely healed for a while. He probably shouldn't move very much from this spot, but that wasn't practical.

"Leia." Draco said, gently touching her arm. She already knew it was him. She recognized his smell even over the blood. Looking at his face for the first time, she saw the overwhelming fear in his eyes. Relief was also there, only slightly, when he looked at her. She had hated how she missed his face, and now here it was decorated with dust, dirt, and blood. His face twisted and small tears eased their way out. Leia was probably still crying from earlier, she couldn't tell anymore.

"Draco." She said, because she couldn't think of any other words to say to him. He cupped her face, like she knew he would, and kissed her softly. Pulling away, they were broken out of their tender moment by the sound of footsteps coming from around the corner. Leia yanked Draco up and rushed to the closest door along the hallway. She slammed the door shut the second they were inside, and the footsteps continued to run down the hall.

She sighed. At least they were safe. It was too dark to see inside the room, but she accidentally kicked a bucket and it sounded like some brooms fell over.

"Lumos." She whispered, as a small ball of light glowed on the end of her wand. It was a supply closet, but a slightly larger one than she expected. It had enough room that they could both lay down with only slight discomfort.

Draco, still weak from whatever happened to him, carefully sat down and grabbed his stomach again. Leia sat down across from him with their bent legs touching, staring at his face.

"You lost a lot of blood and I ran out of blood replenishing potion hours ago. You need to rest." She said.

"I can't believe this is happening here. This was where I spent a good half of my life. I grew up here. And now it's this."

Leia changed the subject.

"What happened to you?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

Leia shrugged.

"I should probably go out of here… There are kids who need medical attention-"

"No. Please don't leave. Not yet." He interrupted.

"I just killed someone." She said.

"You shouldn't blame yourself for not being able to medically help someone."

How nice of him to assume that in the middle of war. If she was blaming herself for the kids that died in her arms, total deaths would be three. But she ignored that.

"No, I saw some guy casting spells on like a third year, so I stupefied him, but he crashed out the window. He landed on another window roof's spike. I saw his body. He's dead."

"You were defending someone, the circumstances are different."

"That doesn't make it any less my fault. Or him any less dead."

"At least _you_ had noble reasons."

Leia realized that it was probably rude of her to complain in front of him that she just killed someone. He had killed someone too. Before she could open her mouth to apologize, a loud blast came from outside the door. Bricks sounded like they were falling. Someone screamed. Leia rushed over to Draco's side in fear. With an arm wrapped around her, she curled her face into his chest, and let him feel her breathing escalate.

They were safe inside the broom cupboard, and Draco silently locked the door with magic to ensure it. Even though Leia knew they were relatively safe, it didn't stop her heart from beating at impossible speeds. Her brain flooded with images of young people dying and bodies everywhere. While hyperventilating into Draco's shirt, her chest and throat burned and hands shook. She felt a familiar pain in her head and knew exactly what was happening to her.

"Panic attack." She said in-between shallow breaths.

"The stone floor is cold, lay down on it." Draco said calmly, while moving her to the ground. He rubbed her back slowly. "Try to breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth."

Leia did that, but faster than someone normally should. Then her brain suddenly and inexplicably flooded with a memory she hadn't thought about in a long time.

"Remember when you were at the beach with Jerome and Margot. It was the last good day to go to the beach." He said as the beach appeared before her eyes. "Remember the smell of the ocean and the soft breeze against your face. Remember the Bjork song that was stuck in your head from the ride there. Remember how the ice cream tasted as it melted in your mouth."

Her breathing became normal and the pain slipped away. She sat up and stared at Draco with a furrow on her brow. She didn't know it was possible to talk someone out of a panic attack that quickly.

"My mom gets them a lot…" He said.

"Thank you." Was all she could say. She realized that he had gotten into her head again.

"I'm sorry, I had to look for a memory to calm you down, and 'beach' was my first guess at a calm memory, and that was the memory I found. I didn't see anything else, I promise."

She swallowed the thought that a death eater now knew were her family was and moved back into his arms and put her head on his chest. The blast from outside had settled.

"I'm sorry."

"Why?"

"I fucked Neville."

He snorted. She probably should have expected it. She didn't even know why she was apologizing. He had slept with Pansy. She had slept with Jerome.

"I know. I didn't learn a thing in potions this semester because I was too busy watching his BDSM fantasies inside his head."

"What was the worst one?"

"He wanted you to wear a dog collar with a tag that said 'Neville's Bitch,' but he knew that wouldn't go over well."

"He's right about that."

"Neville's an alright guy, but he only sees you 2-dementionally. Like in one part there you are as a person with thoughts and feelings, but he sees your body as separate part. He doesn't understand that those thoughts and feelings don't go away when you fuck."

"I think I knew that. Tell me more things."

"I missed you, desperately."

"I missed you too, but I didn't want to."

"I understand."

"Astoria dumped Theo."

"What?" Leia said.

"Apparently Astoria couldn't trust Theo after she heard that he erased your memory."

"Did he tell her?"

"I did."

"Why?"

"I kind of assumed she knew and it slipped out. We've actually become quite close after that. We work well together."

"I can see that."

They were both quiet for a moment. They could hear shots and blasts in the distance. Leia let Draco pet her hair. She wondered if she should say something, but she didn't get a chance.

"I'm scared that if you leave me I won't know if you're alive or not." He said bravely. "Just like when you were gone this year. I was so scared they got to you and never told me, and then I saw into Neville's head. I was so relieved."

"What will happen to you after this?" Leia asked, getting even closer.

"If I survive this battle I will probably be charged with war crimes and sent to Azkaban for life."

"You're assuming that Harry will win?"

"I've never had any doubt that Harry will win."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I just didn't know _when_ Harry would win. But I think it's going to happen tonight. I just don't know how many people will have to die first."

"I don't want you to die." Leia whispered into his shirt. He heard it.

"I fell for you, but it wasn't really all of the sudden like I thought it would."

"You don't have to talk about this."

"No, but I need to. I need you to know that every time you spoke my feelings would grow a little larger. Ever smile, every laugh, every frown would leave my head spinning. I didn't know what to do with myself half the time other than bask in my feelings for you. But you were with Theo. You knew how I felt about you, and you and Theo weren't serious. That hurt me a lot. Theo hurt me a lot. I'm stunned that he and I were still friends after that. I always end up loving the people that hurt me the most. But thank Salazar that you peed on his face. Really, our whole relationship depended on that moment."

Leia laughed.

"And then last year was a combination of my happiest dreams and worst nightmares. I had this terrible burden, but I had you. I was so protective of you because you were everything good in my life. With you I thought I had a future without darkness. I was wrong though, because my actions dictate my future, and I acted in fear. I'm not sorry that I killed a person to save you and my family, I'm sorry I didn't fight for you and my family.

And so it all fell apart, as I knew it would. And you ended up hurt, which killed me. I just wish you would have stayed in the hospital wing. I knew you wouldn't, but the hope that my note would be convincing enough was all I had. Then Bellatrix told me what she did to you and I've never forgiven myself. I don't know if you're aware, but over Easter holiday Harry, Ron, and Hermione were captured and taken to Malfoy Manor. Bellatrix tortured Hermione to get information out of her, but all I could see was you. I've slept since.

I think a part of me still loves you, because I have to. You'll always be a part of me. I really think you're the love of my life, even if we never see each other again. These moments we had together I'll cherish.

However, all in all, Theo really was the one who made our thing happen. He kicked me out of the boy's sleeping area for being up so late at night, forcing me to read in the common room."

"Get out of town."

"Really. I'll never understand how he managed to actually know everything…"

"I think the pee thing was intentional, honestly."

"Really?"

"Yeah, it was so out of character for him. He knew that our relationship was all about sex, so if that got weird then our relationship wouldn't have a purpose. He probably felt like it was time for Astoria to happen, and so that was his way of kicking me to the curb, but weirdly keeping our friendship intact."

"You're probably right."

"There was something dangerous about you, back in fifth year." she said, smiling. "But not really in a cool way, so much as 'oh brother, this little fuck.' I just got this impression from you that you were the worst. I never mistook you for a cool guy as everyone else at Hogwarts did."

He laughed in a way she couldn't remember him doing before.

"But then you kept on surprising me. Maybe it'd be the way you'd arrange your words in a sentence or something very minor, but I'd become really fixated on it and think about it all day. Like one time you mentioned Funyuns casually and I was so amazed for a week that you knew what Funyuns were. I knew I couldn't be around you, it'd drive me crazy. So instead I fucked Theo, and it was weird and bad sometimes, but it was safe. And then Valentine's day happened, and I finally got you. And what I remember from that night was that I had a lot of fun with you. It was easy, but scary. I couldn't handle the fear, so I stayed away from you.

Then everything changed. I came back to school and I felt like you were the only one rooting for me. There was also a part of me that kind of wanted to fix you, but a bigger part that wanted you to stay broken so we could be broken together. I started to feel safe with you even though I knew you weren't. And now the war."

"Tragic."

"Do you wish we would have worked out? That we would have been a normal couple, teenage sweethearts and then we get married and have babies?" Leia asked, not scared of the answer.

"We aren't functional together."

"We would be terrible parents."

He cradled her head up to kiss her forehead. Leia pulled away.

"I should go." She said. Draco didn't try to hold her back as she stood up. She listened through the door for a moment. It was silent.

"Thank you." Draco said coolly before she opened the door. She looked back at him for a moment, but didn't say anything. She opened the door and closed it behind her.


	13. Chapter 13

Runaway by Yeah Yeah Yeahs

* * *

The next time she saw Draco was in the courtyard, where all of the tired students and faculty stood. Leia had forgotten the short series of events that led her to this spot. She was too busy trying to spot every person she knew in the crowd. The first person she spotted was Theo, looking battered and exhausted. He was a little over to her left, close enough that she could call out to him without raising her voice, but she didn't. At least he didn't look severely injured. Astoria was not by his side which either meant that she was somewhere safer, or something that Leia didn't want to think about. Ginny was standing next to Neville, both looking like a shell of their former self. Leia knew why. She had seen Fred's body in the Great Hall earlier. It didn't seem real. It was haunting to see George standing near them. Leia couldn't conceive how he must feel. She couldn't imagine losing her twin. Ron and Hermione were there too, both looking scared but closer than normal.

Leia kept looking for another face, his face, but she couldn't find his shock of blonde white hair anywhere. Instead, she felt a familiar hand entangle hers and she breathed. At least she knew he was alive. At this moment Draco Malfoy was standing next to her and _breathing_, and for whatever reason, that was more comfort than she deserved.

She turned and met his face. His features were in a muddle of emotion, but for some reason he smiled at her, painfully and sadly. Leia didn't return his smile, but stared into the grey eyes that she had grown to know so well, but could never quite understand, over these last few years. She heard others approaching the courtyard. She knew who they were. The Dark Lord had brought Harry's body, she was sure of it. Any hope she might have had was gone, and she didn't dare turn around to see these fears play out.

Draco stepped closer to her and leaned his forehead on hers and they both pretended like they were alone. If only they had been born in a different reality, one where their actions didn't have such dire implications, then they would be perfect. Then Leia could love Draco without any reserve or fear. But they didn't live in that world.

Voldemort started talking, harsh scary sounding words that Leia let Draco listen to for her. People around her started weeping silently, but she and Draco kept very still, as if they were still enough they could disappear.

"I'm sorry I couldn't love you." Leia breathed, breaking the stillness. She wasn't sure if Draco heard her, but she wasn't going to say it again.

"I'm sorry I could." He responded before kissing her lightly on the forehead.

"_Draco_." Someone hissed. Draco didn't look up, knowing the voice was his father's. Voldemort must have just told the crowd that anyone was now able to go over to his side.

"Draco." Another voice pleaded. It was Draco's mother's. Leia didn't have to turn around to know that. This time Draco did look up.

He let go of Leia's hands slowly and walked to follow his mother. Leia found no surprise in that, and she turned to watch him go. When she turned, she saw Voldemort's army in whole for the first time. They were all clad in black and of all different shapes and sizes. Harry laid motionless in Hagrid's arms. Leia's stomach dropped.

She watched Draco meet his mother. She was beautiful.

"Draco, feel free to bring your _toy_ with you." Bellatrix cackled, looking at Leia. Leia visibly tensed at that voice. She'd had nightmares about that voice.

"Oh, yes, the famous Leia Allen could come along." Voldemort said, chuckling darkly. "We would hate for Draco to get bored."

If this had been two years ago, Leia might have hissed some profanity or even been angry at Draco for leaving. But now she was tired. She had no more energy to fight anymore. No desire to fight for justice. No hope for the future. She knew Draco wouldn't say anything. She was sure he hadn't even registered that his aunt had made a comment.

Against everything that she should have done, Leia turned around, and started to walk in the opposite direction of Voldemort's group. Even with all eyes on her, the eyes of her peers, former teachers, and enemies, she kept walking. She exited the courtyard. She left. She was done and ready to go home. Her fight had ended, but she didn't feel like anyone had won.

She walked briskly throughout the castle, only allowing herself to look straight ahead, while pretending that the scenes of rubble and death around her weren't there. When she found herself outside again, this time on the deserted end of the castle, she started running. She was never much of an athlete, much less a runner, but when she found herself outdoors again, her body made the decision for her.

Leia took off in a steady sprint, running off to somewhere far away.


	14. Chapter 14

"In the End" by Ida Maria

Thank you so much to everyone who's stayed with me 'til the very end. Thank you for all your support. I'll miss Leia.

* * *

Some time later...

Leia Allen-Grey and Eugene Grey-Allen were running late, as they were every year. Dragging a fourteen year-old and a twelve year-old to platform 9 3/4 was always an ordeal. Calliope and Yossarian were simultaneously the greatest and most annoying children on the planet. Calliope decided to start packing for a year at Hogwarts last night, and she didn't bother to buy three of her school books because "potions, muggle studies, and divination are crazy boring." Eugene made a run to Diagon Alley late last night even though Leia suggest that they just let her fail. Yossarian at the last moment decided he didn't want to go to Hogwarts and outside the train station it took fifteen minutes of Leia and Eugene convincing him that he wasn't talented enough to join a circus. That was a lie of course, because what circus wouldn't take a their child?

But they finally arrived in one piece.

Leia held Calliope shoulders and looked her square in the eye.

"What did you forget?"

"Towels."

"Calliope, you're existence has brought be joy every day since your birth and I love you, but you do this every goddamn year. Last year it was underwear. Year before socks. This year will be different. I'm not sending you any Goddamn towels."

"Good. I don't want them. I'll drip-dry." Calliope said rolling her eyes.

"Whatever. Just remember what are boys?"

Calliope rolled her eyes.

"The scum of the planet, except for my brother and father."

"Correct. I love you. Don't be dumb."

Leia hugged her and then turned to her son.

"If I get a call from someone that you've run away from school to join a circus, I will hunt you down and kill you."

"Don't worry, I couldn't run that far." Yossarian said.

Leia laughed and hugged her son.

"I love you. Be sweet."

"Okay, bye Mom."

Eugene hugged his daughter and said he'd send towels as soon as they got home. He then hugged his son and told him to be strong. Calliope and Yossarian walked towards the train with all of their things.

Leia saw that Draco and Astoria were giving similar last moment advice to Scorpius, the spitting image of his father. Ron and Hermione, Harry and Ginny, and various others were saying their heartfelt goodbyes before they're children ran off to find their friends. Scorpius found Calliope. They entered the train together.

"If Calliope ends up dating Scorpy I fucking will kill you." Leia said to Draco after the train had departed.

"First of all, it's not my fault if Scorpius received the dashing good looks of his father. Second of all, no child of mine would ever go for a hoodlum like Calliope."

"Well, first if he did get your looks, he's not going to age well. Second, it's not my fault my daughter annoyingly picked up my genes for social disorder. Your son's obviously just attracted to independent and outspoken young women."

"You let her get a nose piercing at fourteen? She looks like she could beat me up. And what's with Yo-yo's hair?"

"She can take it out when she turns twenty-seven, and she could definitely beat you up. And Yossarian asked specifically for a bowl cut. I think he thought he would look more like the Beatles and less like a twelve year old."

Draco laughed.

"How long are you in town?" Draco asked.

"Few more days, there's some pre-fashion week stuff I have to do here and then we'll go back. Then Gene has some publishing stuff to do."

"Have you eaten breakfast?" Astoria asked Leia.

"No, I am starving." Leia said turning to Eugene.

"Let's get a waffle." Eugene said.

They all walked out together laughing.


End file.
